This is a very long letter. The members will loose patience. I have tried to cut short. Delete words underlined in brackets.Dear all,
Firstly allow me to express my thanks and admiration to this forum, that a place I found very rich and useful.
I am applying for an academic position, which requires a motivation letter for application. I am not quite sure about the letter Iíve written (shown below). Could you please help to have a look on it and give me some comments (and correct me if possible)? (by the way, is it a bit lengthy?)
Thank you very much in advance for your help. This is the letter:
Dear Members of the Search Committee:
While (I am writing to) applying for the position of Research Fellow in XXX Center, as advertised on your/the university website, I feel it a unique privilege to give a brief account of myself. I was born and grew up in a maritime family. Starting from my grandfather who was captain of a bulk carrier. and my father a commissar (working) on board, other family members of mine are engaged in all kinds of maritime-related works. (such as ship building/repairing, material supply for ships and so on. As a result of family nurturing, and influenced by constantly hears or sees,) Consequently, I chose maritime as my lifelong career since (I was) very young. (To achieve my pursuit of advanced maritime knowledge,) I left my first job in a (the) shipping company after (I have) working for almost 2 years in 2002, to go to (the countries which have famous sea ports of the world, which are) the Port of Rotterdam and Antwerp for further study in pursuit of advanced maritime knowledge . (The programs have broadened my knowledge in both logistics and economy and guided me in systematical researching and analytical thinking. During) I obtained my master degree in Antwerp under the guidance best professors and industrial professionals additionally supplemented by (several) seminars, workshops, presentations and conferences, I studied several subjects regarded to maritime and transport management. Maritime Economics, (Port Economics and Management, Logistics Strategy, Supply Chain Management Tools etc were some of them. Best professors and industrial professionals gave us tremendous knowledge about current and future industrial practices. My studies were researches and courses oriented and used to supplement by several seminars, workshops, presentations and conferences. I also had many chances to visit premises and facilities such as on boards of different vessels, ports and warehouses.)
After my post-graduate study, I joined a well-known logistics company, ABCDE. in 2007, where I had further opportunity to work in (its headquarter.) different positions (in ABCDE) and broaden my knowledge to (of) many new areas (concepts) which includes (and) getting acquainted with the latest industrial practices. Here I got the scope of having close contact with industry model and dynamics for more than two years at the management center which enabled me to realize the achievement of effective integration of theory and practice . I am still working with the global logistics company, ABCDE and continuing my observation and research on the overall maritime industry. This enables me to expand my knowledge and way of thinking so as to keep track on the latest trend in development of marine industry. In recent years, I have written for various journals covering different types of research articles, and given a number of professional advice for practical actions. From year 2005 till now, I have more than 30 papers to my credit published in various journals and referenced by industrial professionals.
. (I did not take the chance of becoming a logistics teacher, since I deeply understand that theory can not be isolated from reality. In order to better grasp logistics and maritime knowledge, and combine theories and practices effectively. At the end of 2005, I had a further opportunity to work in its headquarter. Different positions in ABCDE broadened my knowledge of many new concepts and got acquainted with the latest industrial practices. Through several years of service for ABCDE, especially close contact with industry model and dynamics for more than two years in the management center, I have further realize my good wishes to achieve the effective integration of theory and practice.)
(At the same time of practicing and working in the global company, I did not suspend the observation and research on the overall maritime industry, in spite of the original purpose of personal interest. This is partly to examine my theories and researching ability. On the other hand, it enables my knowledge and way of thinking follow the trend of industry development. My aspirations lie in the field of maritime, with opportunities for international freight movements.)
I am particularly interested in containerization. My long-standing aim is to get (be) actively involved in the researches on (in) maritime area that I find very exciting. I believe vigorous research on it is (strongly) needed (in order) to find out and evaluate (it and examine its) various possibilities of true application at the service of society's well-being and sustainable development. There are several reasons why I am inclined for (choose) this position. Firstly, it (The position in XXX Center, is) possesses exactly the type of reputation and challenging environment that I would like to be in. secondly, it would facilitate exerting (The) mental and physical efforts (works which are) to achieve something new, which (is) always fascinates and pushes me to strive for more. I wish (My way of) contributing to the research field in a way that should be useful to the scientific community and mankind. Thirdly, (Another reason is) the high reputation enjoyed by (of) your university in (for) producing outstanding academic results and your close relationship with real economic life, would (which) ensure availability of (that) theoretical expertise based on (is supported by) real experience. The combination of these factors makes your position the best choice for me. With my solid knowledge and background in maritime, I firmly believe that I will be a suitable candidate for your research programs and I would greatly look forward to become (being) a part of your team.
In summary, I would like to mention that, I have keen interest in doing research and studies in the field of maritime. (Since the beginning, I am dedicated for it. I am interested in conducting researches in maritime industry. Through studies and working,) Today I have a much better understanding of what this industry is all about and how a successful research has to be done. I would like to pursue my career in this area. I am ready to take responsibilities in any research topic that will be entrusted (provided) to me. ( I believe I could make a valuable contribution in this position.) I am confident that I can perform effectively and contribute signihicantly.because I am excited about working in a dynamic university.
I would enjoy discussing more about this position with you if allow me the privilege. (in the weeks to come.) In the meantime, I am enclosing my curriculum vitae together with copies of academic certificates, and transcripts of detailed results, as well as my articles published in recent years. If you require any additional materials or information, I am happy to supply it. Thank you very much for your consideration.
Student or Learner