Results 1 to 2 of 2

    • Join Date: Jan 2010
    • Posts: 12

    Toefl Essay: Does a person need to earn a lot of money to be considered successful?

    I would really appreciate it if you could tell me what are the "goods" and "bads" of this essay. I am preparing for the toefl test, I am a self learning and I can not ask somebody else (teachers or mates) to take a look. I need to know whether I buid correct sentences/phrases. Do they sound ... fake?

    Thank you in advance!

    What does the word “successful” mean? In the last years a plenty of books were written on this topic and the libraries consider them a good product. Why do people buy books about success? How do we appreciate whether somebody is successful or not?
    For many people success means money, for others success means knowledge, for others – relationships and friends. It depends, generally, on people’s mentality and on their beliefs. For example a priest will consider himself successful if he feels like changing in good other people’s lives, thus the financial part will not be important for him. A scientist will be successful after discovering a new theory. Sometimes their success is related to money as well, but most of the times the scientists are really addicted to their work and their bigger appreciation is not money, but … science.
    I could continue with several examples, but I want to point out that nowadays most of the people mix the definitions of the words “success” and “money”. Why? It is happening because the media advertises money and rich people. Rich people are very often the subject of classroom or friendly discussions. Rich people are the dream of every single little child. Rich people appear at TV, in newspapers, in movies, in the most famous clubs etc. Simple people relate all these activities with the idea of a successful man. This is how money became the reason for which people are considered successful only if they are rich.
    Is this a correct way of thinking? Nowadays we can not say that somebody thinks wrong and we respect all the opinions. Thus, I can say “YES, it can be a good way of thinking”, but what happens next? Don’t people have any other values than money? Are they building their lives having only these purposes: earning money and being successful?
    I think success does not mean only money. I can consider my first teacher a successful woman, even though she was having serious financial problems. She was having always the best students and she was loved for her way of teaching and being. I can consider the neighbor next door a successful man, because he has three beautiful and smart children. I consider myself successful, because I learned to do a lot of things by myself and because I have a lot of friends.
    There are probably different types of success, as there are different types of love and ancient Greeks observed that. This is why I will conclude this essay saying that people are successful if they feel like this. The others have the right to judge and to appreciate it or not.

    • Join Date: Jan 2010
    • Posts: 12

    Re: Toefl Essay: Does a person need to earn a lot of money to be considered successfu

    Thank you very much. I gave the same text to my sister before and she said "it looks perfect to me" :) Now I know I should concentrate more on grammar, but also on vocbulary (like in the case of "advertise", I was thinking that I know to use correctly this word, but there are lots os subtilities). Thank you again. Can I post some other essays? :)

Similar Threads

  1. TOEFL Essay Writing Practice
    By Red5 in forum General Language Discussions
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 05-Feb-2010, 23:28
  2. Can someone please proofread my persuassive essay
    By ricky2520 in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 21-Sep-2008, 13:50
  3. could you please check my essay... (money sense)
    By chrisieck in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 29-Oct-2007, 15:37
  4. TOEFL essay
    By magdalena in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 25-May-2006, 03:45
  5. Replies: 3
    Last Post: 14-Dec-2005, 07:09


Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts