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    • Join Date: Feb 2010
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    #1

    what a valid topic sentence look like?

    If one topic sentence like that:

    Starting school early can benefit not only in terms of children and their families but in society as a whole.

    Then I discuss it by using linking words: To begin with, children will.....;In addition, families will.....;Finally, society will.......

    Q1. Is this a valid topic sentence? (some people said that it was't, because it contained three ideas: children,families, society;others, however, said that it was, because it contained only one idea, that is "benefit")
    I was really confused by this question, would you please help me?

    Q2. If this is a valid topic sentence, are there any other words that can replace those words like "To begin with, ...;In addition, ...; Finally..."?
    I dislike using those words because it seems a bit mechanical.

  1. bhaisahab's Avatar
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    #2

    Re: what a valid topic sentence look like?

    Quote Originally Posted by nixgnoy View Post
    If one topic sentence like that:

    Starting school early can benefit not only in terms of children and their families but in society as a whole.

    Then I discuss it by using linking words: To begin with, children will.....;In addition, families will.....;Finally, society will.......

    Q1. Is this a valid topic sentence? (some people said that it was't, because it contained three ideas: children,families, society;others, however, said that it was, because it contained only one idea, that is "benefit")
    I was really confused by this question, would you please help me?

    Q2. If this is a valid topic sentence, are there any other words that can replace those words like "To begin with, ...;In addition, ...; Finally..."?
    I dislike using those words because it seems a bit mechanical.
    It is not a good sentence, you should remove "in terms of" and "in" before "society". Thus: Starting school early can benefit not only children and their families but society as a whole.

  2. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #3

    Re: what a valid topic sentence look like?

    Quote Originally Posted by nixgnoy View Post
    If one topic sentence like that:

    Starting school early can benefit not only in terms of children and their families but in society as a whole.

    Then I discuss it by using linking words: To begin with, children will.....;In addition, families will.....;Finally, society will.......

    Q1. Is this a valid topic sentence? (some people said that it was't, because it contained three ideas: children,families, society;others, however, said that it was, because it contained only one idea, that is "benefit")
    I was really confused by this question, would you please help me?

    Q2. If this is a valid topic sentence, are there any other words that can replace those words like "To begin with, ...;In addition, ...; Finally..."?
    I dislike using those words because it seems a bit mechanical.
    If it's going to be the title of a piece of writing, I would be inclined to shorten it even further to "Starting school early can benefit children, their families and society"

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    #4

    Re: what a valid topic sentence look like?

    Quote Originally Posted by nixgnoy View Post
    Q2. If this is a valid topic sentence, are there any other words that can replace those words like "To begin with, ...;In addition, ...; Finally..."?
    I dislike using those words because it seems a bit mechanical.
    You can use one of these:
    first of all, second of all,
    first, second, third,
    above all,
    moreover, additionally, also, furthermore,
    to sum up, to conclude.

    And here's a link to many more: Transitional Words & Phrases


    • Join Date: Feb 2010
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    #5

    Re: what a valid topic sentence look like?

    Dear all,
    thank you very much!

    but about the topic sentences mentioned before,
    Starting school early can benefit not only children and their families but society as a whole.
    or
    Starting school early can benefit children, their families and society.
    some people said that it was't a correct topic sentence, because it contained three ideas: children,families, society;others, however, said that it was, because it contained only one idea, that is "benefit".
    Who is right?

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