Results 1 to 4 of 4
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • Israel
      • Current Location:
      • Israel

    • Join Date: Apr 2010
    • Posts: 13
    #1

    Proper usage of commas in inline lists

    I am not a teacher, but I have decent command of the English language. I am editing a text that was not written by me. The author had decided to use this sentence structure:
    "
    The car discussion website example.com hosts all kinds of forums from classics to muscle cars to educational and personal ones.
    "

    As part of my duties, I can modify the punctuation and make very slight grammatical alterations. This is what I came up with, but if there is a better phrasing (however keeping the original sentence structure) I would very much appreciate knowing what I could improve (explanations, not simply rewording for me):
    "
    The car discussion website example.com hosts all kinds of forums, from classics to muscle cars, to educational and personal ones.
    "

    Thank you!



    Subquestion: The first sentence of this post contains the word "had". Should that have been "has", as the decision is still influencing events? Thanks!
    Last edited by dotancohen; 13-Apr-2010 at 05:40.

  1. Raymott's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • Australia
      • Current Location:
      • Australia

    • Join Date: Jun 2008
    • Posts: 24,091
    #2

    Re: Proper usage of commas in inline lists

    Does the site really host all kinds of forums? Are the educational and personal forums unrelated to cars?

    I wouldn't use 'has' or 'had'. The author used this sentence structure.

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Chinese
      • Home Country:
      • Malaysia
      • Current Location:
      • Malaysia

    • Join Date: Jun 2006
    • Posts: 2,130
    #3

    Re: Proper usage of commas in inline lists

    I agree 'all kinds' is a bit far-fetched.

    You can say:

    Example.com is a car discussion website which hosts forums on topics which range from classics and muscle cars to education......

    It's better to have the sentence flow to the end without commas.

    What are 'personal forums'(personal ones)?

    not a teacher

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • Israel
      • Current Location:
      • Israel

    • Join Date: Apr 2010
    • Posts: 13
    #4

    Re: Proper usage of commas in inline lists

    Quote Originally Posted by Raymott View Post
    Does the site really host all kinds of forums? Are the educational and personal forums unrelated to cars?
    I see what you mean. The site hosts many kinds, not all kinds. Thanks!

    The educational and personal forums are in fact related to cars for purposes of discussion.

    Therefore, the revised sentence would be:
    "
    The car discussion website example.com hosts many kinds of forums, from classics to muscle cars, including educational and personal forums.
    "


    Quote Originally Posted by Raymott View Post
    I wouldn't use 'has' or 'had'. The author used this sentence structure.
    I see, thanks.


    Quote Originally Posted by tedtmc View Post
    I agree 'all kinds' is a bit far-fetched.

    You can say:

    Example.com is a car discussion website which hosts forums on topics which range from classics and muscle cars to education......

    It's better to have the sentence flow to the end without commas.
    Though I agree with you, I must respect the original author's structure. This is more a case of "make it compile" than "make it as good as it can be".

    Quote Originally Posted by tedtmc View Post
    What are 'personal forums'(personal ones)?
    Nothing more than a bad example! In the original sentence the objects were not forums, but I cannot post the original sentence here. I rewrote the sentence as my goal is to learn the correct English and apply that knowledge, not to have someone do the work for me!

    Thanks!

Similar Threads

  1. [Grammar] Proper usage of the word "o'clock"
    By cousette in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 02-May-2009, 21:17
  2. [General] the proper usage of the verb "visit"
    By vil in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 01-Jan-2009, 11:52
  3. Proper usage of ONLY
    By Peter2005 in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 06-Oct-2006, 12:31
  4. proper usage of commas
    By JackOu in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 19-Feb-2005, 07:03

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •