[Essay] IELTS, Letter. Please can some one check it. Thanks

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rashidjon

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You have a pen friend living in another country and he/she is curious to know about the major news item in your country.
Briefly describe ONE news story that has been on TV, on the radio, or on the newspapers in your country, and explain why people are interested in it.

Dear Simona,

I am glad to hear from you again. It is always pleasure for me to write you back and today as you have requested I want to write you about major holiday which we have celebrated recently.

Last week we celebrated our Independence day. It is one of the national holidays in my country and people does not work on that day. Whole country celebrates it, people really enjoy this holiday because in each city or towns around the country concerts and special programs are organized. People go out with their families and almost everywhere you can see smiling faces.

After the collapse of Soviet Union in 1991 my country declared its independence. Since then every year the 18 of April is celebrated as Independence day. We are still very young country but I think we have achieved a lot during this period. More than 200 states have recognized our independence and today we have good relationship and established diplomatic ties with many of them. Our economy is growing at a good rate. Besides more and more tourists are visiting our country. Which means my country is finding its right place in the international community.

I hope that someday you will be able to visit my country as well. Simona, I would like to know about recent events that happened in your country.
Thank you for your letter and hope to hear from you soon.

With warm wishes,

John James
 

tranglich

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Jul 31, 2008
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Hi,

I corrected a few mistakes.

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Dear Simona,

I am glad to hear from you again. It is always a pleasure for me to write you back and today as you have requested I want to write you about a major holiday which we have celebrated recently.

Last week we celebrated our Independence day. It is one of the national holidays in my country and people [STRIKE]does[/STRIKE] do no work on that day. The whole country celebrates it, people really enjoy this holiday because in each city or town[STRIKE]s[/STRIKE] around the country concerts and special programs are organized. People go out with their families and almost everywhere you can see smiling faces.

After the collapse of Soviet Union in 1991 my country declared its independence. Since then every year the 18th of April is celebrated as Independence day. We are still a very young country but I think we have achieved a lot during this period. More than 200 states have recognized our independence and today we have good relationships and established diplomatic ties with many of them. Our economy is growing at a good rate. Besides more and more tourists are visiting our country. Which means my country is finding its right place in the international community.

I hope that someday you will be able to visit my country as well. Simona, I would like to know about recent events that happened in your country.
Thank you for your letter and hope to hear from you soon.

With warm wishes,

John James
 
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