please,correct my mistakes

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happys82

Member
Joined
May 7, 2007
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Uzbek
Home Country
Uzbekistan
Current Location
Turkey
Our primary goal is to prepare the owners of our future for life with the help of you and our experts’ hard work within the framework of a great leader’s objectives.
Especially, the most responsive decision we must take is our children’s education. We should make the most correct choice to determine their future.At this point, our school is opening its doors to you. It’s just enough to visit our school We have no doubt that you will choose us.
Thank you for your interest in our organizations and after successful year we want to open new horizons with students, teachers, parents and administrations to the next the academic year.
You can find the registration principles from our catalog.
 

tedtmc

Key Member
Joined
Jun 12, 2006
Member Type
Interested in Language
Native Language
Chinese
Home Country
Malaysia
Current Location
Malaysia
Our primary goal is to prepare the owners (owners of what? leaders?) of our future for life with the help of you and our experts’ hard work(with the help of 'hard work'?) within the framework of a great leader’s objectives(? what are they? ).

Especially,(delete comma, when) the most responsive(important) decision we must [STRIKE]take[/STRIKE] make is on our children’s education. We should make the most correct right choice [STRIKE]to determine [/STRIKE] for their future. At this point, our school is opening its doors to you. It’s just enough (? All you have to do is )to visit our school. We have no doubt that you will choose us.

Thank you for your interest in our organizations (why plural?) and after a successful year, we want to open new horizons with students, teachers, parents and administrations to the next the academic year. (??)

You can find the registration principles (particulars/details/procedures) from our catalog.

not a teacher
 
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