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  1. ella-bella
    Guest
    #1

    help pls

    Please read this sample of work submitted by a student. Imagine you have chosen to write comments underneath the text as a form of feedback. Write your comments in the answer box. Remember that the student is at her elementary level so keep your comments simple.

    My sister is very pretty and good looking. She has beautiful straight black heair. She medium height, about 5 feet 5, I suppose, In her twenties, She have dark braun eyes. She slim and well built. She is wearing in blue T-shirt end jeans. Nadine very like the animals. She is veterinary surgeon. She like to swim and play tennis.

    my answer

    heair - SP
    She medium height - GR
    braun - SP
    She is wearing in blue T-shirt end jeans - GR, (end) SP
    Nadine very like the animals - GR

    My sister is very pretty and good looking. She has beautiful straight black heair.(SP) She medium height,(P) about 5 feet 5, I suppose, In her twenties, She have dark braun(SP) eyes. She slim and well built.(P & GR) She is wearing in blue T-shirt end jeans.(GR) Nadine very like the animals. (GR) She is veterinary surgeon. She like to swim and play tennis.

    is there anything else i can do to make this better?

  2. fighting spirit's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Serbian
      • Home Country:
      • Serbia
      • Current Location:
      • Serbia

    • Join Date: Jan 2010
    • Posts: 199
    #2

    Re: help pls

    Quote Originally Posted by ella-bella View Post

    My sister is very pretty and good looking. She has beautiful straight black heair. She medium height, about 5 feet 5, I suppose, In her twenties, She have dark braun eyes. She slim and well built. She is wearing in blue T-shirt end jeans. Nadine very like the animals. She is veterinary surgeon. She like to swim and play tennis.

    my answer

    heair - SP
    She medium height - GR
    braun - SP
    She is wearing in blue T-shirt end jeans - GR, (end) SP
    Nadine very like the animals - GR

    My sister is very pretty and good looking. She has beautiful straight black heair.(SP) She medium height,(P) about 5 feet 5, I suppose, In her twenties, She has dark braun(SP) eyes. She slim and well built.(P & GR) She is wearing in blue T-shirt end and jeans.(GR) Nadine very likes the animals very much. (GR) She is veterinary surgeon. She likes to swim and play tennis.

    is there anything else i can do to make this better?
    Why don't you correct the mistakes instead of writing in brackets what language part was wrong? It's about an elementary level student, not about someone who is at the university.

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Malayalam
      • Home Country:
      • India
      • Current Location:
      • South Africa

    • Join Date: Jan 2010
    • Posts: 61
    #3

    Re: help pls

    Hi,

    She is a veterinary surgeon.

    *Not a teacher*

    Thanks,
    Anish

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