honesty

[gauri_agr]

Hi All,

Only few of my writtings are edited here. I guess its always lengthy. So this time I am just sending a small paragraph. Please let me know the grammar mistakes, better sentences or any other thing could improve on my writting..

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Dishonesty can never bring happiness. I can remember an incident of my childhood. I and my close friend were going to Pune, India to give my MCA entrance exam. Her father was with us as we couldn’t go alone to the new city. We both saw her father paying just for two tickets. When conductor came he pretended as if he had lost one of his tickets. Both the conductor and her father kept fighting in a loud voice for almost an hour and created a stressful environment in coach of the train we were sitting. It was hard to focus on our notes which we brought to revise in the train on the way to Pune. My friend was a brilliant student and it was surprising when I didn’t see her name in the result. She told me later that she wasn’t able to focus while writing her exam as she was still thinking of her father’s act of stealing the ticket in the train. Her father might have reserved a seat in Pune university if he had paid just one more ticket. Somehow I believe that money we save by dishonesty or stealing does not come to us at all. It seems to be hard to be honest in this era but then it’s also hard to be without disease which comes along with dishonesty. It’s totally up to chose the path intelligently.

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Thanks & Regards
Gauri

 

[billmcd]

Nice lesson. A few suggestions.

Dishonesty can never bring happiness. I can remember an incident [STRIKE]of[/STRIKE] from my childhood. [STRIKE]I and my close [/STRIKE] A (or My) close friend and I were going to Pune, India to [STRIKE]give[/STRIKE]take [STRIKE]my[/STRIKE] our MCA entrance exam. [STRIKE]Her[/STRIKE]My friend's father was with us as we couldn’t go alone to the new city. We both saw her father paying just for two tickets. When the conductor came he pretended as if he had lost one of his tickets. Both the conductor and her father kept [STRIKE]fighting [/STRIKE]arguing in a loud voice for almost an hour and it created a stressful environment in the coach of the train where we were sitting. It was hard to focus on our notes [STRIKE]which[/STRIKE] that we brought to revise (review?) [STRIKE]in[/STRIKE][STRIKE]in the train [/STRIKE]on the way to Pune. My friend was a brilliant student and it was surprising when I didn’t see her name in the results. She told me later that she wasn’t able to focus while [STRIKE]writing[/STRIKE]taking her exam as she was still thinking of her father’s act of [STRIKE]stealing the ticket in the train[/STRIKE]dishonesty. Her father might have reserved a seat for her in Pune university if he had paid just one more ticket. Somehow, I believe that the money we save by dishonesty or stealing does not come to us at all. It seems [STRIKE]to be [/STRIKE]hard to be honest in this era but then it’s also hard to be [STRIKE]without[/STRIKE] free from disease [STRIKE]which[/STRIKE]that sometimes results from [STRIKE]comes along with [/STRIKE]dishonesty. It’s totally up to everyone to choose the path intelligently.

 

[gauri_agr]

thanks you so much for the quick reply.