Student or Learner
We are glad to announce a special scheme to make your wishes come true. You dream to own a glittering gold jewellery or may be a sparkling diamond jewellery set that adorns your friends beauty. You desire to own the top-end luxury watch or accessories that your colleague possesses. You long to see joyful smild of your sweetheart, when you bend on your knee in front of her to present her a glistening platinum ring. You want to buy jewellery for your daughters wedding. Now nothing could stop you from fulfiling your dreams or from enjoying those special moments of your life. Buy jewelery on emi
It doesn't make my heart beat faster. How about moving the first sentence to nearer the end?
You long to see a twinkle in the eyes of your wife or girlfriend, when you present her the diamond jewellery set. You wish to own gold jewellery more elegant and charming than your friends. Your wait is over. Now you can make your wishes come true, buy jewellery on EMI, itís really that simple now.
You have comma splices at the end.
Personally, I don't like to be told what I wish. If you said "If you long for..." or "If you wish..." with the answer to my desires, I'd prefer that than to being told what I want.
I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.