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    #1

    revising of four simple sentences 2

    Dear teachers,

    Would you be kind enough to revise the following sentences?

    The revolving door had been keeping on in move.

    Do you know the sitting student in the corner.

    Turning over the pages of the book, Ivan stuck accidentally his name.

    I was so frightened that I nearly fell down in a fit.

    Thanks for your efforts.

    Regards,

    V.

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    #2

    Smile Re: revising of four simple sentences 2

    Quote Originally Posted by vil View Post
    Dear teachers,

    Would you be kind enough to revise the following sentences?

    The revolving door had been keeping on in move.

    Do you know the sitting student in the corner. I would say the student sitted in the corner

    (
    Turning over the pages of the book,)Ivan stuck accidentally his
    sub clause

    name.complex sentence



    I was so frightened (that I nearly fell down in a fit). complex sentence
    noun clause


    Thanks for your efforts.

    Regards,

    V.
    ***NOT A TEACHER***
    Be careful with complex sentences, you should review your notes

    ps/ the noun clause is the one which starts with that onwards Iīve tried to edit it but it remains under I was so frightened
    Last edited by elhithebest; 27-Jun-2010 at 01:45.

  1. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #3

    Re: revising of four simple sentences 2

    Quote Originally Posted by vil View Post
    Dear teachers,

    Would you be kind enough to revise the following sentences?

    The revolving door had been keeping on in move.
    The revolving door had kept on moving.

    Do you know the sitting student in the corner.
    Do you know the student sitting in the corner?

    Turning over the pages of the book, Ivan stuck accidentally his name.
    I don't understand what you mean. How does someone "stick his name"?

    I was so frightened that I nearly fell down in a fit.
    I was so frightened, I nearly collapsed!

    Thanks for your efforts.

    Regards,

    V.
    See above.

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    #4

    Re: revising of four simple sentences 2

    Hi emsr2d2,

    Thank you for your emendation.

    Here is my second try to give a truly rendering of the unclear sentence in my original post:

    Turning over the pages of the book, Ivan stuck accidentally his name.
    Turning over the pages of the book, Ivan came upon accidentally his name.

    Thank you again for your kindness.

    Regards,

    V.

  2. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #5

    Re: revising of four simple sentences 2

    Quote Originally Posted by vil View Post
    Hi emsr2d2,

    Thank you for your emendation.

    Here is my second try to give a truly rendering of the unclear sentence in my original post:

    Turning over the pages of the book, Ivan stuck accidentally his name.
    Turning over the pages of the book, Ivan came upon accidentally his name.

    Thank you again for your kindness.

    Regards,

    V.
    Ah. So he was turning the pages of a book and then suddenly saw his own name? That would be a surprise!

    I think the phrasal verb should be "stumbled upon". This means to find something unexpectedly.

    Also, I'm not sure that "accidentally" is really the word here. He was not "accidentally" reading the book and, although he may not have been looking for his own name, it was there anyway. "Unexpectedly" would be better.

    Turning over the pages of the book, Ivan unexpectedly stumbled upon his own name!

    We also sometimes use "stumble across" to mean the same thing.
    Last edited by emsr2d2; 27-Jun-2010 at 08:26. Reason: Extra info

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