[General] Please correct my letter

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muruganandan

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Please correct the mistakes in below letter.

Dear Mr.Abey,

Thanks you, I received your mail and also mail copy by fax. I have received chillies and Red-Millet samples from my suppliers. The same I shall send you by courier today. I have read your mail carefully and noted all your points. What all you said in the mail about chillies trade is absolutely true. Here I would like to highlight my strength and how I planed to overcome the competitor.

1. As I told you in my previous mail that the chillie supplier is going to export directly to your client. He is in the business since 1980 and supplies to most of the Colombo exporters. He has good knowledge in Chillies market and knows how to select the best quality at lowest rate. Also being an exporter himself he will put all his effort to dispatch the cargo as per schedule. Other exporters have to depend on their supplier for quality /schedule and most of the times they receive inconsistent quality and they don’t have total control over quality/schedule..

2. I’m taking care of all export operation like customs clearance, documentation and taking containers directly from shipping line without depending on freight forwarder personally. Most of the other exporters will depend on CHA for all these activities. I have very good contact with almost all shipping line in Chennai and can get best ocean freight compared to other exporters and CHA. Most the exporters will depend on CHA for taking the containers and CHA would keep some margin. My cost of the operation expenses would he much lower compare to other exporters. While I was with Siva, I have reduced many of his operation expenses compare to prior to my arrival. Even at tough times like shortage of containers in market and Non-availability of trailers at peak seasons, we have not missed the ship. Once cargo arrives, I see that it is loaded in next available vessel. During my tenure with Siva, not even once we missed the ship with cargo in hand.

3. My exporters don’t have any staff at Chennai and they totally depend on me for all activities. For me I have only one staff to assist me. My exporter and I don’t have many overheads. Since I’m taking care of all activities personally, chance of mistake is almost eliminated and flow of information from my side would be available always.

Based on above strength I have the confidence that I can give you better quality chillies at lowest market rate with best service. I will work with minimum margin without compromising on quality. If at all any exporter offers lesser price that my price, he might be having stock in hand purchased previously at lower rate or he should do some mixing in quality.

I look forward in receiving your valuable order soon.

With Kind Regards,
S.Muruganandam.
 

emsr2d2

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With all due respect to Gillnetter, there are a couple of other amendments:

You need a space after "Mr." in "Dear Mr. Atey"
The first word of the letter should be "Thank" not "Thanks".

In paragraph 2, Gillnetter corrected your use of "Chillies" to "chile". However, the singular of "chillies" is simply "chilli". (Chile is the country).

I'm sure these were simply oversights on Gillnetter's part, as his corrections are usually spot on! :-D
 

muruganandan

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You have a problem with articles (a, an, the) and tenses. If an event happened in the past, you do use "is", but "was". Beyond these small problems your letter sounds very good.

Thank you very much Sir for correcting my letter. You said that I have problem with articles (a,an,the) & tenses. Please suggest me how to improve without these mistakes.

Thank you once again
 

emsr2d2

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Yes, I did miss some. Chili is the American spelling, not chile (the country).

Ah, that's interesting - only one "L" in AmE spelling? I didn't know that! Chilli in BrE.
 
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