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    #1

    Smile ever more

    Please correct the following sentence.

    As our social security is deteriorating, it shows that the police is ever more important.

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    #2

    Re: ever more

    Hi there,

    As your starting your sentence with "As", I think that your "It shows..." is not correct. It sounds weird to me.
    I'd probably go with :
    "As our social security is deteriorating, the police ARE even more important."

    I might be wrong, though.

    edit : my mistake, thanks for pointing it out :]
    Last edited by Dood.; 22-Nov-2010 at 02:18. Reason: correction

  1. Barb_D's Avatar
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    #3

    Re: ever more

    Police takes plural.

    The police are important.
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

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    #4

    Re: ever more

    The sentence is revised as written. Is it better?

    As our social security is deterioratng, the police are even more important.

  2. Barb_D's Avatar
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    #5

    Re: ever more

    Yes, but "social security" still doesn't really work for me.
    With an increase in crime?
    As we feel less secure in our communities?
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

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    #6

    Re: ever more

    Quote Originally Posted by Barb_D View Post
    Yes, but "social security" still doesn't really work for me.
    I don't get it either.
    The sentence is grammatically correct for me, even if it probably doesn't make sense ;p
    Last edited by Dood.; 22-Nov-2010 at 04:43. Reason: correction

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    #7

    Re: ever more

    The sentence is revised as written. Is it acceptable?

    As our social's safety is deteriorating, the police are even more important.

    or

    As our social order is deteriorating, it shows the police are even more important.

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    #8

    Re: ever more

    Quote Originally Posted by contiluo View Post
    The sentence is revised as written. Is it acceptable?

    As our social's safety is deteriorating, the police are even more important.

    or

    As our social order is deteriorating, it shows the police are even more important.

    ***** ONLY A NON-TEACHER'S OPINION *****


    Contiluo,

    The other posters have done an excellent job in advising you. May I

    give you my two cents[' worth]?

    I would suggest something such as:

    As social order deteriorates, the police become more

    important than ever.

    NOTE: The term "social security" for Americans usually means some

    money from the government to cover our basic expenses.


    ***** ONLY A NON-TEACHER'S OPINION *****

  3. Raymott's Avatar
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    #9

    Re: ever more

    Quote Originally Posted by contiluo View Post
    The sentence is revised as written. Is it acceptable?

    As our social's safety is deteriorating, the police are even more important.

    or

    As our social order is deteriorating, it shows the police are even more important.
    There are two meanings of 'as'; and both are possible here.
    The first is "because": "Because our social order is breaking down, the police are even more important"
    The second meaning of 'as' is something like "along with, in parallel with":
    "As the social order breaks down, the role of the police becomes more important"
    (see the conjunction definition here)
    As - definition of As by the Free Online Dictionary, Thesaurus and Encyclopedia.

    Your first sentence is correct, with the meaning of "because".

    Your second sentence is not correct, because you need a subject referent for "it". But you could write:
    "The deterioration of our social order shows that the police are becoming even more important." (A debatable proposition if the police are causing it).
    You can use "as" with its second meaning:
    "As our social order deteriorates, our police are becoming even more important."

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