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  1. Newbie
    Interested in Language
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Gujarati
      • Home Country:
      • India
      • Current Location:
      • India

    • Join Date: Feb 2011
    • Posts: 1
    #1

    Thumbs up Sentence Formation

    I am sending a formal email wherein i would like the other person to refer to another email which is pasted after my email. Please let me know if its correct usage of English and if there are no grammatical mistakes

    I have currently entered the text:

    Hi ____,

    Below is an email correspondence providing details of ______ requirements. I would request your views and confirmation on Point 4. As discussed we would propose a 2-day visit for discussions with the <<Company>> members to be undertaken by you. There is also a mention of a ___________________ Guide which we need to factor-in the costs in addition to the consultation aspect.

    Regards
    ________________

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • British English
      • Home Country:
      • England
      • Current Location:
      • England

    • Join Date: Mar 2007
    • Posts: 119
    #2

    Re: Sentence Formation

    Below is an email correspondence providing details of ______ requirements. I would request your views and confirmation on Point 4. As discussed we would propose a 2-day visit for discussions with the <<Company>> members to be undertaken by you. There is also a mention of a ___________________ Guide which we need to factor-in the costs in addition to the consultation aspect.

    Below is an email correspondence providing details of ______ requirements. I would request your views and confirmation on Point 4. As discussed we would propose a 2-day visit, to be undertaken by you, for discussions with the <<Company>> members. There is also a mention of a ___________________ Guide which we need to factor-in the costs in addition to the consultation aspect.

    In sentence 3, it's the visit that is to be undertaken by the recipient, not the members.

    The last sentence is confusing: Are the costs to be factored into the Guide, or is the Guide needed as a document to help the factoring-in process?

    Uncle M

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