Correction of a writing

[Thumbelina]

Good evening,
I'm preparing my first certificate of cambridge.
I'm training in writing part.
If you can help to correct, thank you.


As soon as Roy opened the door, he knew something was wrong. Already when had arrived, he had noticed a smell of petrol which was coming through the flat.

Quietly, he stood in the entrance. His wife Rebecca was putting petrol on the wall with a can. At the moment she saw him, she stopped and glared at him. After a short moment of silence she held a match as she ordered him to tell the truth.

Immediately he understood what she meant. Roy knew she had married a clever woman. She wasn’t joking. Moreover he hadn’t done too much not to be discovered. He had been on a love affair with their au pair for three months. Consequently he confesses and added that it wasn’t serious. He hadn’t loved her.

Hearing theses words, Anna became crazy and shouted she hadn’t known his unfaith. She was disgusting with the possibility that a man could love a girl of twice his age.

In a last movement, she scratched the fire and made their lovely home disappeared with them.

 

[bhaisahab]

Good evening,
I'm preparing my first certificate of cambridge.
I'm training in writing part.
If you can help to correct, thank you.


As soon as Roy opened the door, he knew something was wrong. Already when had arrived, he had noticed a smell of petrol which was coming through the flat.

Quietly, he stood in the entrance. His wife Rebecca was putting petrol on the wall with a can. At the moment she saw him, she stopped and glared at him. After a short moment of silence she held a match as she ordered him to tell the truth.

Immediately he understood what she meant. Roy knew she had married a clever woman. She wasn’t joking. Moreover he hadn’t done too much not to be discovered. He had been on a love affair with their au pair for three months. Consequently he confesses and added that it wasn’t serious. He hadn’t loved her.

Hearing theses words, Anna became crazy and shouted she hadn’t known his unfaith. She was disgusting with the possibility that a man could love a girl of twice his age.

In a last movement, she scratched the fire and made their lovely home disappeared with them.

Hello Thumbelina, is this something that you are supposed to submit for marking? If it is, post it here after you have been marked on it and we can help you with any questions you may have.