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    • Join Date: Aug 2005
    • Posts: 7
    #1

    complete the letter

    Hi everyone,
    I understand how hard it is to correct someone else’s writings, all right! You don't need to create a new one. Just look at this.
    Now I am presenting it like a BIG-gap-fill exercise. Let’s talk about

    WRITING TASK 1

    You want to study in Britain. Write a letter to the president to change one of your courses and inquire some relevant information. You do NOT need to write your own address.

    Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir/ Madam,

    Below are my suggestions (commentaries to clarify some ideas are given in the brackets)

    Dear Sir/ Madam,

    (First, EXPLAIN YOUR MATTER IN BRIEF)

    I am writing you to inquire about … (What should I put here?)

    (Next, DESCRIBE THE SITUATION IN DETAIL.)

    (As I got it from the question a person would like to study in Britain. Where? If it is a British university or college you probably should give your educational background. Any suggestions?)

    I graduated from secondary school in Russia this year and I am planning to continue my education in Britain.
    (Any other facts?)

    After careful consideration I decided to apply for admission to your college, since I think it is the best place to advance my career.

    My area of concentration in … (college) will be … (specialty)….

    (the best I’ve managed to think up)


    (After that, ACTIONS TO BE TAKEN)

    I am interested in receiving more information …

    (Right here I should request course change and relevant info. The problem is I can’t imagine what kind of change of what kind of course I might need to change. What relevant information exists, anyway?)

    (Finally, CLOSE YOUR LETTER)

    Enclosed is a self-addressed, stamped envelope for your convenience in replying. Thank you for your time and consideration.

    Yours faithfully,
    Signature

    FEEL FREE TO CHANGE ANY PART OF MY WRITING

  1. Editor, UsingEnglish.com
    English Teacher
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • British English
      • Home Country:
      • UK
      • Current Location:
      • Laos

    • Join Date: Nov 2002
    • Posts: 60,732
    #2

    Re: complete the letter

    OK, I'm in a rush, so I am going to make a couple of suggestions now and will be back later for more.

    First, I'd start the l;etter by saying:
    I am writing to ask whether it is possiblle to change one of my courses.

    I'd finish with:
    Thjanking you in adv ance, I look forward to hearing from you,



    • Join Date: Aug 2005
    • Posts: 7
    #3

    Re: complete the letter

    Dear tdol,

    Thank you for your attention to my request. The fog is going to clear out, isn't it? So I will begin as follows

    Dear Sir/Madam,

    I am writing to ask whether it is possiblle to change one of my courses.

    I graduated from secondary school in Russia this year and I am planning to continue my education in Britain. Does it look right to you?
    After careful consideration I decided to apply for admission to your college, since I think it is the best place to advance my career. What next? Time to get down to facts. Anyone to develop the context?
    ......................

    Enclosed is a self-addressed, stamped envelope for your convenience in replying.


    Thank you in advance and look forward to hearing from you soon.

    Yours faithfully,

    ..................

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