[Essay] Could someone please check my essay, plz?

[hyunism]

Hi, I am posting one of my draft essays for MBA admission. English is my second language, Please check for the errors and let me know the modifications required. Please help me.
Topic. Describe a situation where your values, ethics or morals were challenged. How did you handle the situation?

 

[Raymott]

Hi, I am posting one of my draft essays for MBA admission. English is my second language, Please check for the errors and let me know the modifications required. Please help me.

Wouldn't they be using this essay as an indication of your English level? It would be unlikely to help them if it was edited by a native speaker.