had better - warning?

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keannu

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My grammar book says "had better" is something like warning that says if you don't do what the speaker says, you will disbenefit from not doing that, so you shouldn't use it to older people or seniors. Is it true? or flexible?

ex)You had better not watch TV. You had better go there.
 

5jj

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It's generally just used to make a suggestion, give advice. Its fine to use older people if it is appropriate to give older people advice.

With the right intonation, it can be threatening.
 

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But the suggestion is quite firm. If I'm suggesting a visit I might say 'Don't miss the Sistine Chapel' or 'Make sure you visit the Louvre'. If I said 'You'd better visit the Sistine Chapel' you'd think I was slightly deranged and ask if Nurse knew I was out of bed, or perhaps assume I'd been reading Dan Brown! ;-)

b
 

5jj

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... assume I'd been reading Dan Brown!
Who's Dan Brown?

uh-oh. I'm not following my own advice to others - I'd better google the name.
 

BobK

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Who's Dan Brown?

uh-oh. I'm not following my own advice to others - I'd better google the name.

What Google may not tell you is that his books often use big-name settings like the Louvre, which I thought made the reference quite neat.

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5jj

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Not being a Brown fan, I missed that.
 

BobK

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I wouldn't like it thought that I'm a fan - I just have a tiresome inability to stop reading a book once I've started it. ;-)

b
 
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