[Essay] Can someone correct my short essay?

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danny777

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I had to write a short essay(approx. 200 words) about advertising,but I'm sure that it has some mistakes. I would be most grateful if somebody helped me :)

As many of you are currently studying advertising or marketing,my views on this topic might be of some interest to you.
Advertising is carried on in a great variety of ways through the media,in the streets or in the shops themselves. A new form of advertising called direct advertising appeared. Brochures,leaflets flood people's home advertising what is on sale in different shops and supermarkets. Not only can we see advertisements in the street, but we can see advertisements on the Internet as well. If we visit a website, a banner pops up advertising either another website or various products.
Advertising with all its cheating techniques and gimmicks help to hoodwing the public into buying even substandard goods. Apart from that, there are certain advertisements which are not meant to be viewed by children, for instance:smoking and alcohol advertisements. These advertisements have led people to a question whether viewing advertisements adversely influences children, and if so, what may be done in this case. I firmly believe that these advertisements should be banned.
However, there are also funny and humorous advertisement which everybody likes.
To sum up,advertisements, however peculiar it may sound at first,play a very important role in our lives.

That's all:p I would be very happy I you gave me some tips to improve my writing skills. Thanks in advance:)
 

februar

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I had to write a short essay (approx. 200 words) about advertising, but I'm sure that it has some mistakes. I would be most grateful if somebody helped me :)

As many of you are currently studying advertising or marketing, my views on this topic might attract your attention. Advertising is carried [STRIKE]on[/STRIKE] in a great variety of ways through the media, in the streets or in the shops themselves. A new form of advertising called direct advertising appeared. Brochures, leaflets flood people's home advertising what is on sale in different shops and supermarkets. Not only can we see advertisements in the street, but we can see advertisements on the Internet as well. If we visit a website, a banner pops up advertising either another website or various products.

Advertising with all its cheating techniques and gimmicks help to hoodwink the public into buying even substandard goods. Apart from that, there are certain advertisements which are not meant to be viewed by children, for instance: smoking and alcohol advertisements. These advertisements have led people to the question whether viewing advertisements [STRIKE]adversely[/STRIKE] influences children adversely, and if so, what might be done in this case. I firmly believe that these advertisements should be banned.
However, there are also funny and humorous advertisements which everybody like.

To sum up, advertisements, however peculiar it may sound at first, play a very important role in our lives. (To me, this sentence seems to be an empty one – perhaps you could specify your opinion about what is peculiar and why advertisements play an important role to you?

That's all:p I would be very happy I you gave me some tips to improve my writing skills. Thanks in advance:)
 
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