a small story by my daughter

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gauri_agr

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United States
Hi,

Please correct/modify the mistakes in the following paragraph...

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I love telling stories for my children. Since children want to the things what we generally do. My three year old daughter started telling stories pretty much when she started speaking. Though her stories are/were always having just one or two sentences. A few days back I had my sister-in-law’s family visiting us over the Christmas time. I asked my daughter to show her talent by telling a story. I also asked her to tell the story a bit longer. She was excitedly ready and instructed all of us that we need to ask her “what happened next”. Below is her story

There was giant demon. One day he ate a big lion. We all asked her back “then what happened next” She told further that one day that demon ate a big tiger. She kept repeating this with all the animals she knew. Then she moved on household stuffs which were in the room in front of her. So She further added to her story that “one day demon ate the couch, pillows, blanket….” . Once she was done with all the objects in the room she added the body parts of mine and narated further that, “One day demon ate mama’s nose, mama’s eyes…..we pretended to be tired of listening her the same thing over and over again. So I asked on behalf of everyone that, “okay dear, we assume that demon ate everything then what happened next”. She replied,” then it’s the end of the story”. She asked every one to clap for her for telling such a big story and interesting story

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Thanks in advance
Gauri
 

februar

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Sep 10, 2011
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Interested in Language
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German
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Hi,

Please correct/modify the mistakes in the following paragraph...

-------------------------------------

I love telling stories for my children since children want to do everything what we generally do. My three-year-old daughter started telling stories pretty much when she started speaking. Though her stories [STRIKE]are/were always having[/STRIKE] (it isn’t an action or a happening) had (Or: consisted of) just one or two sentences) A few days ago my sister-in-law’s family was visiting us over the Christmas time. I asked my daughter to show her talent by telling a story. I also asked her to tell a longer story than usual. She was excited and ready and instructed all of us that we need to ask her “what happened next”. Below is her story.

There was a giant demon. One day he ate a big lion. We all asked her back “then what happened next?” She told further that one day that demon ate a big tiger. She kept repeating this with all the animals she knew. Then she moved on to the household stuff (no pl.) which was in the room in front of her. So she further added to her story that “one day the demon ate the couch, pillows, blanket….” . Once she was done with all the objects in the room she added the body parts of mine and narrated further that, “One day the demon ate mama’s nose, mama’s eyes…..we pretended to be tired of listening to her the same thing over and over again. So I asked on behalf of everyone that, “okay dear, we assume that the demon ate everything, then what happened next? She replied,” then it’s the end of the story”. She asked everyone to clap for her for telling such a big story and interesting story.

------------------------------------

Thanks in advance
Gauri

februar, no teacher
 

gauri_agr

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Joined
Jan 19, 2010
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Student or Learner
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Hindi
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India
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United States
thanks a lot. sorry for saying thanks so late.
 
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