[Essay] help me with my essay

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primrose3st

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Common Advantages and Disadvantages of Social Websites
People become use internet for [FONT=&quot]three[/FONT] hours everyday at least. One of the most browsing websites nowadays are the social websites. There are more than 800 million people have account on social websites such as Facebook, Twitter and My space. Because of social websites made connect with other people easily, Facebook and Twitter become trend nowadays. Actually social websites have many advantages, which make them popular. Also there are disadvantages that people have not realized them yet. That is why before anyone start to create new account should know the advantages and the disadvantages of social websites.
One of the main advantages of social websites is making connecting with other people easily, even if they are far away from you. In addition, people can ask question or be connected with any famous or important person that common people have difficulty to reach them. Beside, facebook andtwitter give to us full information about any person you want to connect with and make you know what are things both of you and your friends share. Using social websites let you know if your friends are online or not .So you can chat with them
Furthermore, social websites spread the last news, which let people discuse about it. For instance, any group of people can discuese about global warming or football game or any type of topic. Thus, let people write their opinion freely and easeful. Moreover, talented people have the ability to show their talent simplicity on social websites and they may be famous and known people. Otherwise, the advertisers use social websites to advert to new products. Truly, social websites have benefits that non of T.V channels or magazines or newspaper have. Because social websites have been created to contain what everyone need.
On the other hand, social websites have different disadvantages .For example some people use fake identity of famous people. This problem makes us doubtful about other people identity. However, there are group of people send untrue news so, there are other people spread these news which make the ignorant people believe it .In addition, there are whom who use social websites in bad way such as stole other people accounts .Also social website pages are not supervised unlike other websites .For this reason, young kids are able to read about subject that are not allow to read about in some countries .These are the most common problem in social websites.
In my opinion using social websites are important today. They are make you know what happen in this world. However, social websites simplified connecting with other people around the world. In the other side, we must be careful with using social websites. So we must to know what are the advantages and disadvantages.
what do you think of my essay?
 

5jj

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I have started with the first paragraph:
Common Advantages and Disadvantages of Social Websites
People [STRIKE] become use[/STRIKE] are using/have become used to using) internet for three hours everyspaceday at least. [STRIKE]One[/STRIKE] Some of the most visited browsing websites nowadays are the social websites. There are more than 800 million people who have an account on social websites such as Facebook, Twitter and My space. Because [STRIKE]of[/STRIKE] social websites have made connecting with other people eas[STRIKE]il[/STRIKE]y, Facebook and Twitter have become trendy nowadays. Actually social websites have many advantages, which make them popular. Also there are disadvantages that people have not realized [STRIKE]them[/STRIKE] yet. That is why, before anyone starts to create new account, they should know the advantages and the disadvantages of social websites.
 

tedtmc

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Here are the next few paragraphs, corrected and edited. I find it easier without having to highlight the corrections on the original.
I think the title should be 'advantages and disadvantages of...', without the 'common'.

One of the main advantages of social websites is that they allow people to connect and communicate easily, even if they are far away from each other. People can ask questions or be connected with any famous or important person that common people have difficulty to reach. Besides, Facebook and Twitter give us full information about people we want to connect with, including the interests that we share.
While using social websites, you know if your friends are online so that you can chat with them.

The latest news are spread on social websites and people can discuss about it. For instance, any group of people can discuss about global warming or a football game. Thus, the sites allow people to express their opinions freely and easily. Talented people have the opportunity to show their talents on social websites and they can become famous and well-known. Advertisers use social websites to advertise new products. Truly, social websites have benefits that other media do not have because the former have been created to cater to everyone’s needs.

On the other hand, social websites have their disadvantages .For example some people fake the identity of famous people. This problem makes us wary about other people’s identities. There are also people who spread false news, preying on other people’s ignorance. In addition, there are those who use social websites in a bad way such as hacking into other people accounts .Also, social websites are not supervised unlike other websites .Children can have access to subjects and materials that are not suitable for them in some countries .These are the most common problems in social websites.

In my opinion, social websites are important today as they allow us to know what is happening around the world. They enable people around the world to be connected easily. On the other hand, we must be careful with using social websites. This can be achieved if we know the advantages and disadvantages


You need to work on your grammar and sentence constructions.
 
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primrose3st

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thanks 5jj and tedtmc for editing
and i know my grammar is weak:-(
 
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