My first comment is that there are too many one-sentence paragraphs. It isn't very good style to ave them- it makes it harder to read and seem a bit fragmented. It also jumps around a bit- Xmas parties, Finland, Turku. If I asked you to summarise th aim f this writing in a single sentence, what would you say it is. It starts with violence arrising at Xmas parties and ends on a historical note. The ending seems to be an afterthought rather than a part of the whole. I'd try to link it together more so it's clear why you're writing this.