Please check the following sentences. Are they acceptable? Which is better?
1. There are a lot of boys out there who are trying to escape the military service, but in my humble opinion,
only those who have served in the military can truly call themselves a man.
2. There are many boys out there who are attempting to get around the military service, but in my opinion,
only those who have served in the military can truely call themselves a man.
3. There are many boys out there who are attempting to skip the military service, but it is of my opinion that
only those who have served in the army can truely call themselves a man.
Last edited by Ashiuhto; 08-Mar-2012 at 14:55.
- I prefer "many boys" to "a lot of boys" but have no grammatical reason for this, I just think it flows better.
- I think "get around military service" works the best, assuming you mean they are trying to avoid or evade their legal requirement to spend some time in the military? If you say they are trying to "escape" it, it makes me think they are already in the military and trying to get out. "Skip" works OK, but I think "get around" is best.
- I would avoid "in my humble opinion" as it is usually used by people who are *not* humble! It can sound very arrogant and cause people to react in a negative manner, which I don't believe is your intention. Options 2 or 3 (without the "of") sound fine and I have no real preference for one or the other.
I have corrected a couple of other minor mistakes. "Military service" would not normally need a "the". At the end, if they (plural) are calling themselves (plural) "something", it's probably best to make that "something" also in the plural.
Last edited by Tullia; 08-Mar-2012 at 15:07. Reason: Tidying up the BB code