My holidays (1)

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ripley

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Joined
Sep 25, 2004
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Italian
Home Country
Italy
Current Location
Italy
Hi, I'd like native speakers to check my text about holidays.I've diceded the text into three parts, so it is less time consuming for you to check. Thanks a lot.

My family and I like going on holiday.
People may go on holiday for different reasons. They may want to relax. Sometimes there's nothing better than sitting by a pool or on a beach and getting into a good book. They may want to take a break. If life's too hectic at home, people often use a holiday to escape.
Some people may want to experience a new culture - From museums and galleries to rich history and amazing people, new countries offer new cultural experiences and tourists enjoy it. They may want to go on holiday for adventure, or to watch a sporting event - From soccer to athletics, the world has a host of sporting events that people flock to see. For example the 2012 is the year, in which the European Football Championship, Euro 2012, takes place. The final tournament will be hosted by Poland and Ukraine. The 2012 is also the year of the Olympic Games in London. The 2012 Summer Olympics are planned to take place between July and August.
The Italian olympic committee had chosen the swimmer champion Federica Pellegrini to be the flag bearer; but she declined with the excuse that she doesn’t want to stand in a stadium for up to eight hours the night before her first race.
I’m a swimmer at a competitive level and Federica is my favourite swimmer. A member of my team, a girl named Diletta, who is just 16, will participate in the competition in London, in the Italian swimming relay.
I would really like to go to London to see the competition. If I had 1200 euros I would buy the ticket for my family; but I would need also money for the plane tickets; so, I should have a lot of money.. I’ll see the competitions on TV.
According to tastes, personality and budget you may decide a different kind of holiday; you may decide to go on exotic beach holidays, a safari, on spa holidays; you may decide for a weekend trip, or for last minute holidays.
Some people may decide to go each time to a different destination; some others, like my family and I, like to go on holiday mostly to the same place: Corsica.
 

moonlike

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Joined
Mar 26, 2012
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
Persian
Home Country
Iran
Current Location
Iran
Hi, I'd like native speakers to check my text about holidays.I've diceded the text into three parts, so it is less time consuming for you to check. Thanks a lot.

My family and I like going on holiday.
People may go on holiday for different reasons. They may want to relax. Sometimes there's nothing better than sitting by a pool or on a beach and getting into a good book. They may want to take a break. If life's too hectic at home, people often use a holiday to escape.
Some people may want to experience a new culture - From museums and galleries to rich history and amazing people, new countries offer new cultural experiences and tourists enjoy it. They may want to go on holiday for adventure, or to watch a sporting event - From soccer to athletics, the world has a host of sporting events that people flock to see. For example the 2012 is the year, in which(instead of in which: when) the European Football Championship, Euro 2012, takes place. The final tournament will be hosted by Poland and Ukraine. The 2012 is also the year of the Olympic Games in London. The 2012 Summer Olympics are planned to take place between July and August.
The Italian olympic committee had chosen the swimmer champion Federica Pellegrini to be the flag bearer; but she declined with the excuse that she doesn’t want to stand in a stadium for up to eight hours the night before her first race.
I’m a swimmer at a competitive level and Federica is my favourite swimmer. A member of my team, a girl named Diletta, who is just 16, will participate in the competition in London, in the Italian swimming relay.
I would really like to go to London to see the competition. If I had 1200 euros (,) I would buy the ticket for my family; but I would(I would also need money...) need also money for the plane tickets; so, I should have a lot of money.. I’ll see the competitions on TV.
According to tastes, personality and budget you may decide (on) a different kind of holiday; you may decide to go on exotic beach holidays, a safari, on spa holidays; you may decide for a weekend trip, or for last minute holidays.
Some people may decide to go each time to a different destination; some others, like my family and I, like to go on holiday mostly to the same place: Corsica.

Sorry, I'm not a native speaker.However, I read your writing. It was great! If you don't mind I have added a few points.
Good luck
 

ripley

Senior Member
Joined
Sep 25, 2004
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Italian
Home Country
Italy
Current Location
Italy
Thanks a lot!
 

februar

Member
Joined
Sep 10, 2011
Member Type
Interested in Language
Native Language
German
Home Country
Switzerland
Current Location
Switzerland
Hi, I'd like native speakers to check my text about holidays. I've decided the text into three parts, so it is less time consuming for you to check. Thanks a lot.


My family and I like going on holiday.

People may go on holiday for different reasons. They may want to relax. Sometimes there's nothing better than sitting by a pool or on a beach [STRIKE]and[/STRIKE] getting into reading a good book. They may want to take a break. If life's too hectic at home, people often use a holiday to escape.

Some people may want to experience a new another culture - from museums and galleries to rich history and amazing people. Mainly [STRIKE]new[/STRIKE] foreign countries offer new cultural experiences and tourists enjoy it.


They may want to go on holiday for adventure, or to watch [STRIKE]a[/STRIKE] sporting events - from soccer to athletics. The world has a host of sporting events that people flock to see. For example, the year 2012 is the year, in which (Or 'when' as moonlike suggested) the European Football Championship, Euro 2012, will take place. The final tournament will be hosted by Poland and Ukraine. The year 2012 is also the year of the Olympic Games in London. The 2012 Summer Olympics are planned to take place between July and August.


The Italian Olympic committee had chosen the swimmer champion Federica Pellegrini to be the flag bearer; but she declined with the excuse that she[STRIKE] doesn’t[/STRIKE] wouldn’t want to stand in a stadium for up to eight hours the night before her first race.

I’m a swimmer at a competitive level and Federica is my favourite swimmer. A member of my team, a girl named Diletta, who is just 16, will participate in the competition in London, in the Italian swimming relay.
I would really like to go to London to see the competition. If I had 1200 euros, I would buy the ticket for my family; but I would also need [STRIKE]also[/STRIKE] money for the plane tickets; so, I should have a lot of money. I’ll see the competitions on TV.
According to taste, personality and budget you may decide on a different kind of holiday; you may decide to go on an exotic beach holiday, a safari, on a health spa holiday; you may decide for a weekend trip, or for a last minute holiday.
Some people may decide to go each time to a different destination; some others like my family and I do, like prefer to go on holiday mostly to the same place: Corsica.

One error I saw only after reading moonlike's correction. You know that I'm not a native speaker, too, don't you?
februar
 
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