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    #1

    Thumbs up Help me correct these three sentences? Thank you!

    Would you mind help me correcting these three sentences, thank you.

    If people can't earn enough money, how can you expect them to pursuit public recognition. They need money to support their lives. My salary is below the average, so every night I tell myself I have to work harder to earn more money, otherwise I will starve.

  1. Barb_D's Avatar
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    #2

    Re: Help me correct these three sentences? Thank you!

    Quote Originally Posted by heyuting View Post
    Would you mind help me correcting these three sentences, thank you.

    If people can't earn enough money, how can you expect them to pursuit public recognition? But what do you mean by "public recognition"?

    They need money to support themselves.

    My salary is below the average, so every night I tell myself I have to work harder to earn more money, or else I will starve.
    You can say "... more money. Otherwise, I will..." But you can't join it with a comma as you did.
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

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    #3

    Re: Help me correct these three sentences? Thank you!

    Thank you. "Public recognition" maybe means everyone thinks you are successful.

    Quote Originally Posted by Barb_D View Post
    You can say "... more money. Otherwise, I will..." But you can't join it with a comma as you did.

  2. 5jj's Avatar
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    #4

    Re: Help me correct these three sentences? Thank you!

    Quote Originally Posted by heyuting View Post
    If people can't earn enough money, how can you expect them to pursuit public recognition.
    The verb is 'pursue'. However, even with this change, the sentence seems strange, Not many people actively pursue public recognition.
    Last edited by 5jj; 08-Apr-2012 at 13:40. Reason: typo

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    #5

    Re: Help me correct these three sentences? Thank you!

    Thank you.

    But I don't think not many people actively pursue public recognition.

    At least in my country, reputation is somewhat vital for certain people.
    Quote Originally Posted by 5jj View Post
    The verb is 'pursue'. However, even with this change, the sentence seems strange, Not many people actively pursue public recognition.

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    #6

    Re: Help me correct these three sentences? Thank you!

    I'm still struggling with what you want to say. If people don't earn enough money, how can they pursue being recognized for having a lot of money? Is that what you mean to say? That seems like a tautology. If a man in not incredilbly handsome, how can he make sure people know he is very handsome... It seems to be same sort of thing.

    (Note that public recognition is not the same things as reputation.)
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

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    #7

    Re: Help me correct these three sentences? Thank you!

    Thank you. That's a good point.
    Actually it's a topic that some people care public recognition more than money, so they will pursue public recognition even though they won't earn any money.
    So I use my personal experience to support it. Is it convincing?
    Thanks.

    Quote Originally Posted by Barb_D View Post
    I'm still struggling with what you want to say. If people don't earn enough money, how can they pursue being recognized for having a lot of money? Is that what you mean to say? That seems like a tautology. If a man in not incredilbly handsome, how can he make sure people know he is very handsome... It seems to be same sort of thing.

    (Note that public recognition is not the same things as reputation.)

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    #8

    Re: Help me correct these three sentences? Thank you!

    Um... no.
    Perhaps you could use simpler sentences and try to say it another way.
    Something as simple as "Some people care more about public recognition than money."
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

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    #9

    Re: Help me correct these three sentences? Thank you!

    Um... Can you give me one example?
    What I want to say is that I care money more than public recognition. Because I have to earn money first.
    Thank you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Barb_D View Post
    Um... no.
    Perhaps you could use simpler sentences and try to say it another way.
    Something as simple as "Some people care more about public recognition than money."

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    #10

    Re: Help me correct these three sentences? Thank you!

    Quote Originally Posted by heyuting View Post
    Um... Can you give me one example?
    What I want to say is that I care money more than public recognition. Because I have to earn money first.
    Thank you.
    You just did it yourself.
    I care about making money more than I care about being famous.
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

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