I am writing a bursary letter and would appreciate some constructive critisism.

I am a potentialstudent pursuing my bachelor in child and youth care. While I am looking intopursing my career I am struggling with severe financial challenges which I willdisclose during the course of this letter. I will be very successful at studieswith an opportunity to focus but my current circumstances donít seem to allowme go with my dream. I am working on the proper process to allow this to happenand hope that your organization will help me as a student for the purpose of completingmy studies. I write this letter to implore you if there is a scope to supportme with a bursary.
I am 27and this is the third time I have looked into attending Grant MacEwanís Child andYouth Care program. The reason I have not attending the course as of yet is thefinancial burden that accompanies secondary education. At this point in my life I am determined towork out a way to afford my future education which is a challenge.
I originally looked into attending the course the year of my graduation in 2003.When working out the cost of school along with living expenses this was extremelyoverwhelming! Unfortunately I did not have the option of relying on family forassistance. Initially I moved on and began working full time in the automotiveindustry. I enjoyed my time and work during this period but the industry is nolonger the way it was when I began and I began having a hard time feeling fulfilled.At this time I decided once again to look into taking the course part time. Ionly ended back at the frustration of not knowing how I could make ends meet financially.

Finally Ihave realized he challenges I face could never dilute my intentions to pursuemy education. Now I see these difficulties as opportunities in disguise. I wantto set an example for the people challenged by finances, particularly in myintended line of work. More than that, with each difficulty I face, the greatermy determination to proceed grows. My conscience suggests that the gap betweenmy problems and the success is the initiative to ask for help.
You willappreciate my passion and abilities once I am enrolled in school. But withoutthe help with funding I wonít be able to make it possible. I am meant for thiswork but need help to get there. What all I have now is hope.
There arehelp like this whose presence makes needs such as mine easier to bear. I needthis bursary to complete my bachelor. Any help will be one step closer. I willmeet rest of my needs through part time work and some savings.
I amsending this application with great expectations. I shall be grateful if yourorganization could favorably consider my case. I can be available for anyquestions that may arise.