Correct my cover letter please!!!

Status
Not open for further replies.

Goobee

New member
Joined
Dec 12, 2012
Member Type
Interested in Language
Native Language
Vietnamese
Home Country
Vietnam
Current Location
Hong Kong
This is a draft of my cover letter to apply for a master's degree program. I'm really not confident in my formal English. So can anyone review or correct it for me? Thank you very much.

-----------------------------------------------------
Dear Sir/Madam,
I am writing to express my interest in applying for master’s degree program the first year level in Applied Mathematics (M1 de Mathématiques Appliquées) at Ecole Polytechnique. I believe my strong academic background combined with my work experience will fulfill your requirements.

I have just completed my Engineer’s degree from XXX University with the highest mark of capstone project (9.9/10) and a GPA of 8.29/10 ranking fifth on over 100 students. These results encourage me to apply for Master 1 program in Applied Mathematics at Ecole Polytechnique.

I have been always passionate for Mathematics during my studying at school and university. At high school, although I could not enter the class of Mathematics but class of Physics, I still spent a lot of time on Mathematics. My strong ability in Mathematics and Physics brought me the prize in the National Physical Olympiad for gifted high school students. During university, I still remained a great love with Mathematics by participating in the National Mathematical Olympiad for students in several years, and also won prizes.

For the last two years I have been working in a research program in the cooperation between XXX University and NTT Laboratory (NTT Cooperation, Japan). This has given me both work experience and the acknowledge of application of Mathematics in information technology, especially in system optimization and simulation. My interest has now spread to computers and linked between computers and mathematics.

Once I had a visit to the NTT Cooperation in Japan, I wished that one day [Name of my country] could develop as far as Japan. Nevertheless, I choose France for my target environment because France has long been considered the country of mathematics as well as engineering. I believe that knowledge and skills gained during the Master's studies will be applicable in my home country.

As a hard-working, enthusiastic, young person, I willing to study for the development of [Name of my country] in future. Therefore, I would very much like to achieve this by following this master’s degree program in Applied Mathematics. I hope that you will view me as a favorable candidate for this program.
Thank you very much for considering my application. I am looking forward to your positive response.

Sincerely yours,
[My full name]
 

Goobee

New member
Joined
Dec 12, 2012
Member Type
Interested in Language
Native Language
Vietnamese
Home Country
Vietnam
Current Location
Hong Kong
is there anyone here? Please help me! Could you give me any suggestions or corrections?
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top