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    #1

    Need correction of a text with 450 words

    Hello,
    I had to write a process description in english using the passive.
    Iam now searching for someone who would take a look on it to find mistakes.
    Anybody here whom i can mail it? Maybe leave a PN

    Regards

  1. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #2

    Re: Need correction of a text with 450 words

    Quote Originally Posted by Bubuzela View Post
    Hello,
    I had to write a process description in English using the passive.
    I am now searching for someone who would take a look on at it to find mistakes.
    Is there anybody here to whom I can mail it? Maybe leave a PN. (What is a PN?)

    Regards.
    You are looking for someone to do a professional proofreading/editing job for which, quite rightly, a fee will be charged. Given the errors in this post (which I have corrected in red above), a 450-word text is going to be a long and arduous job. You will need to pay someone to take that kind of time to do this for you.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

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    #3

    Re: Need correction of a text with 450 words

    Sry, this was just a fast written text (PN is a "private Nachricht" so just a translation mistake must be PM then) Iam just looking for someone who can read my text one or two times to find coarse mistakes.
    For e.g. iam not sure with the sentence:

    "[...] take now place at the same time:

    While the road is closed and the water pump is started, [...] is being placed by [...]"

    Or


    If needed they can now take over from (sb. )

  2. Barb_D's Avatar
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    #4

    Re: Need correction of a text with 450 words

    Quote Originally Posted by Bubuzela View Post

    "[...] take now place at the same time: Do you mean "The following activities occur simultaneously"?

    While the road is closed and the water pump is on started, [...] is being placed by [...]" Not sure what this means

    Or


    If needed they can now take over from (sb. )
    You should just post your text here and see if someone can take a look.
    Personally, I like the larger font, but some people prefer the standard-sized one.

    Why do you want to write it in the passive?
    If these are instructions, using direct comments is much easier for the person to read and follow.
    I'm not a teacher, but I write for a living. Please don't ask me about 2nd conditionals, but I'm a safe bet for what reads well in (American) English.

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    #5

    Re: Need correction of a text with 450 words

    Technical manuals do tend to use an authoritative and impersonal tone. But it's not just as simple as wording everything in the passive.

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    #6

    Re: Need correction of a text with 450 words

    u mean that the activities occur simultaneously
    yes!
    So with:
    While the road is closed and the water pump is started [by sb.] [sth.] is being placed [by sb.]
    are iam right now?

    And iam forced by my teacher to write a process description by using the passive...
    Last edited by Bubuzela; 17-Dec-2012 at 20:23.

  3. emsr2d2's Avatar
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    #7

    Re: Need correction of a text with 450 words

    Quote Originally Posted by Bubuzela View Post
    yes!
    So with:
    While the road is closed and the water pump is started [by sb.] [sth.] is being placed [by sb.]
    are iam right now?

    And iam forced by my teacher to write a process description by using the passive...
    So this is homework?
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

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