[Essay] Writing task

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staycalm

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My task was the following:
You recently had a meal at your friend David's restaurant, on the same evening that a food critic was there. The critic's review has since appeared in a local newspaper.
Write a letter to the editor of the newspaper, giving reasons why you disagree with the review and explaining why you recommend the restaurant.

I had to mention some information:
- the restaurant was opened in 1992
- the critic is not right when he states that the food was supposed to be 'authentic French' but he doubts the chef has ever even been to France
- the diners were not disappointed
- the reason why the owner never made an appearance

Dear Editor,

I am writing to express my disappointment regarding the lack of accuracy which appeared in the review of the Corso Bistro & Café in your newspaper. I was dining in this restaurant at the same time as your critic, Joe Carroll, and in my opinion, his observations were completely unrealistic.

Firstly, Mr Carroll should have checked the precise date of the bistro’s opening, as it was established in 1992, and not just ‘recently opened’.

Mr Carroll’s remarks on the food were absolutely unfair. If he had taken the effort to consult with the chef, he would have found out that he has won several awards due to his profound knowledge of French cuisine.

The large tips and the praising words to the waiters suggest that the diners were completely satisfied with the quality of the service they got.

It is true that David, the owner of the bistro was not there at that night, but if Mr Carroll had asked any of the waiters, he would have been informed that David was in the hospital due to a minor car accident.

I would recommend this restaurant to anyone without hesitation. I have been going there for more than 10 years now, and not a single time have I been disappointed by their service.

Yours faithfully,
(here comes the signature)
Peter Bishop
 

Koronas

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Do you have a question? The only fault I can see is incorrect positioning of commas.
 

staycalm

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Do you have a question? The only fault I can see is incorrect positioning of commas.

Oh, I forgot to tell that my intention was to find someone who would correct my letter. If there's no other mistake than the ones with the comma, could you tell me where exactly are those mistakes and how to correct them? Thank you!
 

Koronas

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I am a NsE not a teacher.

Many people think that a comma marks "a breathing space". This belief is not exactly true. A reasonable test of comma position is to replace commas with parentheses (brackets). If the sentence makes grammatical sense, with the phrases in brackets removed, it will still make sense with commas.

Example:
It is true that David (the owner of the bistro) was not there at that night but (if Mr Carroll had asked any of the waiters) he would have been informed that David was in the hospital due to a minor car accident.

It is true that David () was not there at that night but () he would have been informed that David was in the hospital due to a minor car accident.

It is true that David, the owner of the bistro, was not there at that night but, if Mr Carroll had asked any of the waiters, he would have been informed that David was in the hospital due to a minor car accident.

Example:
The cat (which had black fur) was sitting on the mat.

The cat () was sitting on the mat.

The cat, which had black fur, was sitting on the mat.

Example:

He removed the painting (which was his reason for going to the museum).

He removed the painting ().

He removed the painting, which was his reason for going to the museum.
 
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staycalm

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I am always confused with the use of commas. In my native language, Hungarian, we use them a lot of times and in different ways than in English. Your explanation was quite helpful, so thank you!
 
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