[General] layout wording

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Ashiuhto

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Is the wording of the following layout acceptable to native speakers?

Internet Addiction in Junior High School Students
Written by Sarah Zeng (910), Regina Zhou (910) & Kelly He (916)
Commented and corrected by Tony Luo
Correction date: March, 2013

p.s. The italics are the title, and the parentheses stand for class.
 

Rover_KE

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I'd embolden the title and delete 'Commented and'.
 

Ashiuhto

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Internet Addiction in Junior High School Students
Written by Sarah Zeng (910), Regina Zhou (910) & Kelly He (916)
Corrected by Tony Luo
Correction date: March, 2013

 

Barb_D

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I would suggest "edited" instead of "corrected."
 

Ashiuhto

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Nov 30, 2010
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English Teacher
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Taiwan
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Internet Addiction in Junior High School Students
by Sarah Zeng (910), Regina Zhou (910) & Kelly He (916)
March 2013

Edited by Tony Luo
 
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