Could you please help me correct my essay?

[iamphan]

I'm jush a English learner. I try to practice English writing by answering English question on this website(iteslj.org/questions/). Could you please help me correct my English writing? Thank you in advance. : )


1. Describe a perfect date.
In my opinion, it is when 2 people have some activities that create memories together. It could be normal activity such as watching in cinema, dining at restaurant, shopping or travalling but the most important thing is they have to be happy together.


2. Describe the appearance of the person you like to date?
I like woman with good body shape, white skin and beautiful face.


3. Describe the character of the person you like to date?
Sweet, easy going and funny.


4. Do you know what it means to 'go Dutch'?
I don't know but I look upin wikipedia. It means that when a group of person go eating at restaurant, each person pays for themselves. It's also called 'Dutch date' or 'Dutch treat'.


5. Is it usual for people in your country to 'go Dutch' if you go out together?
I think it isn't. In my country a man usually pays for girl.


6. Do you believe in love at first sight?
50/50. I think it begin with first impression. If person you've met has the appearance that you like, it could be a chance to continue and become a girlfriend/boyfriend. Then if that person has the character that you like, it also could be a chance to get married and grow old together. So it depends on luck you have.


7. Where are some popular place to go on date?
I think, in working day, it is restaurant or cinema. But, in long weekend, it is the sea or the mountain.

 

[emsr2d2]

I'm [strike]jush[/strike] just an English learner. I try to practice English writing by answering English questions on this website (iteslj.org/questions/). Could you please help me correct my English writing? Thank you in advance. : )


1. Describe a perfect date.
In my opinion, it is when [strike]2[/strike] two people [strike]have[/strike] do some activities that create memories together. It could be a normal activity such as watching a film/movie [strike]in[/strike] at the cinema, dining at a restaurant, shopping or travelling but the most important thing is they have to be happy together.

It's an OK answer but I think it wanted you to describe what would be a perfect date for you.


2. Describe the appearance of the person you like to date?
I like a woman with good body shape, white skin and a beautiful face.

Obviously, you are answering for yourself, but if you are asked this kind of question in an exam or in real life, I recommend that you don't mention skin colour. Your answer might be perceived as offensive/racist.


3. Describe the character of the person you like to date?
Sweet, easy-going and funny.


4. Do you know what it means to 'go Dutch'?
I [strike]don't[/strike] didn't know but I looked it [strike]upin[/strike] up on Wikipedia. It means that when a group of [strike]person[/strike] people [strike]go[/strike] [strike]eating[/strike] eat at a restaurant, each person pays for themselves. It's also called 'Dutch date' or 'Dutch treat'.


5. Is it usual for people in your country to 'go Dutch' if you go out together?
I think it isn't. In my country [strike]a[/strike] the man usually pays for the [strike]girl[/strike] woman.

If you want to use "man", then combine it with "woman". If you want to use "girl" at the end, then use "boy" earlier in the sentence.


6. Do you believe in love at first sight?
50/50. I think it begins with first impressions. If you like the look of a person you've met [strike]has the appearance that you like[/strike], [strike]it[/strike] there could be a chance to continue and become [strike]a[/strike] girlfriend and boyfriend. [strike]Then[/strike] If you also like that person's character [strike]has the[/strike] [strike]character[/strike] [strike]that you like[/strike], [strike]it[/strike] you might also [strike]could be a chance to[/strike] get married and grow old together. So it depends on luck. [strike]you have.[/strike]


7. Where are some popular places to go on a date?
I think, [strike]in[/strike] on a working day, [strike]it is[/strike] to a restaurant or the cinema. But, [strike]in long weekend[/strike] at the weekend/for a long weekend, [strike]it is[/strike] the sea or the mountains.

Please see my amendments and comments above. You need to concentrate on your use of articles.

 

[Odessa Dawn]

1. Describe a perfect date.
In my opinion, it is when 2 two people have do some activities that create memories together. It could be a normal activity such as watching a film/movie in at the cinema, dining at a restaurant, shopping or travelling but the most important thing is---they have to be happy together.

It's an OK answer but I think it wanted you to describe what would be a perfect date for you.

I think that that can be inserted here, but it is an optional, isn’t it, please? Also, if it were inserted here, it would be functioning as conjunction, wouldn’t it, please?

2. Describe the appearance of the person you like to date?
I like a woman with good body shape, white skin and a beautiful face.

Obviously, you are answering for yourself, but if you are asked this kind of question in an exam or in real life, I recommend that you don't mention skin colour. Your answer might be perceived as offensive/racist.

Thank you, ems, not only for teaching us English, but also for guiding us choosing suitable words when we address others, I must say.

​

​

 

[Chicken Sandwich]

I think that that can be inserted here, but it is an optional, isn’t it, please? Also, if it were inserted here, it would be functioning as conjunction, wouldn’t it, please?​

You could use "that" in place of the dashes.
​

 

[Raymott]

"Obviously, you are answering for yourself, but if you are asked this kind of question in an exam or in real life, I recommend that you don't mention skin colour. Your answer might be perceived as offensive/racist."

But what if he does prefer white women and he's just being honest? Does this mean he can't list his preference for a good body and being beautiful either - which could offend other people? I wouldn't write it on an exam either. But in real life sometimes you have to say what you mean, and if other people feel offended, that's their right.

 

[emsr2d2]

"Obviously, you are answering for yourself, but if you are asked this kind of question in an exam or in real life, I recommend that you don't mention skin colour. Your answer might be perceived as offensive/racist."

But what if he does prefer white women and he's just being honest? Does this mean he can't list his preference for a good body and being beautiful either - which could offend other people? I wouldn't write it on an exam either. But in real life sometimes you have to say what you mean, and if other people feel offended, that's their right.

OK, perhaps in real life he should be honest! The warning remains. Much as I hate all the politically correct nonsense, you will find people who are offended by such statements either on their own behalf or even on behalf of others whose opinion has not been sought. In some circles and some jobs, such statements can end in disciplinary measures or worse. Whatever you think of those potential outcomes, they still have potential and should be considered.

 

[iamphan]

Thank you everybody so much. : )

 

[Rover_KE]

iamphan, instead of sending your thanks in a separate message, just click the Like button, please.

The reason is that it is flagged as a new post, so we think you might have a follow-up question or something to add. Those of us with slow internet connections and/or old computers have to waste valuable time waiting for it to appear.

Thank you.

Rover