motivation Letter

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Eline

New member
Joined
Aug 29, 2013
Member Type
Student or Learner
Native Language
Dutch
Home Country
Netherlands
Current Location
Netherlands
Hello,

I am trying to write a motivation letter for my application for the University of Tilburg. So far, I have written a short piece about my international background and one about my international drive and motivation. If you could read and react, it would be very nice!

I was born in Diessen and moved to Oirschot at the age of six. There, I went to the Paulusschool, one of the local primary schools. When I was thirteen years old, I went to the Jacob Roelands Lyceum in Boxtel, which can be seen as the equivalent of the english grammar school. At the moment, I am in my last year of gymnasium, also called 6VWO. My best subjects are mathematics and the languages (English, French, Latin and German). In the fourth grade I recieved my
FCE
-certificate and I recieved my
CAE
-certificate this july. Since my school provided the English Plus (cambridge) class, they decided to take us on a trip to Cambridge. There, we stayed in small groups with our host families and we took courses at the university. Most of my family lives in het Netherlands and a few members live abroad in countries such as: the USA, in New Zealand and China.

My family and I are really interested in cultures and so we have travelled to countries such as Italy, Thailand, Sweden and France. In Thailand, where we went this summer, I started to learn Thai with the help of our local tour guide Aoi Phuangdokmai, who is still supporting me through e-mail and social media, while I help her learning the Dutch language. I aspire to see a lot more of the world and to learn more languages to be able to communicate with more people. Next summer I will be attending a 4-week course arranged by EF in New York, to improve my English skills.

Thank you!

Eline
:)
 

billmcd

Key Member
Joined
Mar 27, 2009
Member Type
English Teacher
Native Language
English
Home Country
United States
Current Location
United States
Hello,

I am trying to write a motivation letter for my application [STRIKE] for [/STRIKE] to the University of Tilburg. So far, I have written a short piece about my international background and one about my international drive and motivation. If you could read and react, it would be very nice!

I was born in Diessen and moved to Oirschot at the age of six. There, I went to the Paulusschool, one of the local primary schools. When I was thirteen years old, I went to the Jacob Roelands Lyceum in Boxtel, which can be seen as the equivalent of [STRIKE] the [/STRIKE] an English grammar school. At the moment, I am in my last year of gymnasium, also called 6VWO. My best subjects are mathematics and the languages (English, French, Latin and German). In the fourth grade I recieved my
FCE-certificate and I recieved my CAE-certificate this July. Since my school provided the English Plus (Cambridge) class, [STRIKE] they [/STRIKE] the administrators decided to take us on a trip to Cambridge.While there, we stayed in small groups with our host families and we took courses at the university. Most of my family lives in the Netherlands and a few members live abroad in countries such as: the USA, [STRIKE] in [/STRIKE] New Zealand and China.

My family and I are really interested in cultures and so we have traveled to countries such as Italy, Thailand, Sweden and France. In Thailand, where we went this summer, I started to learn Thai with the help of our local tour guide Aoi Phuangdokmai (Is it necessary to identify the tour guide by name?), who is still supporting me through e-mail and social media, while I help her learning the Dutch language. I aspire to see a lot more of the world and to learn more languages to be able to communicate with more people. Next summer I will be attending a 4-week course arranged by EF (?) in New York, to improve my English skills.

Thank you!

Eline
:)

Some suggested minor changes.
 
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