Student or Learner
I´d like to ask you for correction of this article and giving some feedback The task was to write an article about Have family life changed in comparison with situation 50 years ago. Has it became better or worse than before.
many thanks in advance
Decline or evolution of family?
One of the most important things in our lives is a family. Unfortunately, many families experience hardships, both financial and emotional ones, which increase the rate of divorce and have considerable influence on the numbers of married couples and newborn babies
Most of ordinary family difficulties concern all of us. But these irrelevant troubles sometimes overgrew into frequent passionate disputes and even cause a domestic violence. It certainly affects close relationship with beloved persons. Where do these problems come from?
Maybe, it results from a current situation of family in society and our lifestyle. Nowadays, most of young people prefer enjoying their lives, having a fun with friends, getting qualification for their jobs or visiting other countries than sitting and taking care of children and family. It is also influenced by more opportunities to spent time or by high demands at work or at school, that grow constantly That’s why we forget to take care of our families. But has this situation in family been always the same? Have it ever been better in the Czech Republic?
Everything was completely different fifty years ago. It was period of time after the second world war when people were delighted at family because they suffer without them during the long period of time when some of their friends or relatives even lost their lives or were seriously injured. This post war era was distinguished by a new social security, certainty of own job and by a family support from our socialistic or communist state. That’s why more people got married than divorced or had more than one or two babies. But were there any problems in families as well? Of course, but only some of them were common such as an unhappy love or generation gap but it ´s similar and even worse in these days.
I think that this way of our family life isn’t very positive and agreable, especially for children who suffer from that most. We should learn from our mistake and inspire ourselves from the situation fifty years ago. I hope everything will be better in the future.
is a family- our/the
financial and emotional ones- no need for 'ones'
Most of ordinary- Most ordinary (and in paragraph 2)
irrelevant troubles- if they concern us, they aren't 'irrelevant'
overgrew into frequent passionate disputes- grow into passionate disputes
a domestic violence- domestic violence
It certainly affects- should be 'they' as you refer to problems, etc, and in the next paragraph too
beloved persons- people we love/our loved ones
having a fun- having fun
than sitting- instead of sitting around
by more opportunities- by having...
Have it ever- Has
period of time- the period after...
delighted at- happy to be with
post war- post-war
distinguished- marked by
certainty of own job- certainty of employment
in these days- these days
way of our family- kind of family life
suffer from that most - suffer the most from it
our mistake- mistakes
inspire ourselves- take inspiration from