As the fire was dying down, Mark was drifting off to sleep.

[Freeguy]

What's wrong with this sentence? (It sounds correct to me.)


As the fire was dying down, Mark was drifting off to sleep.

 

[MikeNewYork]

It is correct for me also.

 

[emsr2d2]

It's OK for me too. As are:

As the fire died down, Mark was drifting off to sleep.
As the fire died down, Mark drifted off to sleep.
As the fire was dying down, Mark drifted off to sleep.

Remember that "as" is sometimes used to mean "because" as well as "At the same time as".

 

[Boris Tatarenko]

Is it required to say "drift off to sleep" instead of "drift off"?

As the fire died down, Mark drifted off.

 

[Rover_KE]

Yes.

 

[Freeguy]

Michael Swan claims that it must be "while" not "as". Look below:

As is used (with simple tenses) to talk about two situations which develop or change together. We normally don't use while in this sense. We usually use "while" to say that two longer actions or situations go/went on at the same time.

Ex: As I get older I get more optimistic.
Ex: While you were reading the paper, I was working.

 

[Barb_D]

In this case, I don't agree with Swan. There is nothing wrong with "as" in the original sentence.

 

[MikeNewYork]

I don't see anything in Michael Swan's words that preclude this usage.

In this case, the fire died down and Mark was drifting off. It happened at the same time.

 

[Tdol]

Michael Swan claims that it must be "while" not "as".

He actually says we usually use, which is a very different thing from must be. He is describing tendencies and patterns, not absolute rules. He does not exclude the usage of while with the simple or as with the progressive. He describes what we normally do or do not do, but nowhere in that quote does he talk about having to use one form.

 

[Barb_D]

In that case, I do agree.

 

[Tdol]

As a general point, Swan is looking for patterns of usage; it's a good idea to follow the patterns he suggests because he is very good at spotting them. However, they are often patterns and not absolute rules. If you find sentences that deviate from the patterns, it doesn't mean they're wrong; they could be a less common variation.

 

[emsr2d2]

Note that we can "drift off" without falling asleep. In the middle of a boring meeting (or class), you might drift off and start thinking about something much more interesting (like your collection of toenail clippings). ;-)

 

[5jj]

For those who don't know Swan, see here.

 

[Raymott]

What's wrong with this sentence? (It sounds correct to me.)
As the fire was dying down, Mark was drifting off to sleep.

It's quite possible that the sentence is 'wrong' in the context in which you've used it. Your question seems to indicate that someone has told you it was not a good sentence - and they might be right.