had or having?

[roseriver1012]

Before I knew it I was in my thirties, married, ____________ a job, yet still had this idea in my mind with each passing year.

Is "had" or "having" fit for the gap according to the context? Thanks for help!

 

[Rover_KE]

This looks like your homework, roseriver, which we don't do.

 

[roseriver1012]

This looks like your homework, roseriver, which we don't do.

I don't know what makes you think so! Maybe I should have asked in another way?
If "had" is in the blank, the sentence may be considered as one consisting of a series of predicates connected with "yet"; if "having" is in the blank, "married", together with "having a job" may be considered as the adverbial part of the sentence. So which option sounds natural or right? Thanks.

 

[bhaisahab]

Only "had" works for me.

 

[Rover_KE]

This looks like your homework...

I don't know what makes you think so!

It's the sort of question students get for homework and you made no effort to tell us what you thought the answer might be.

 

[emsr2d2]

If it's not a set question with only two possible responses, I'd like to add an option. I would say "... married, with a job, ...".

 

[roseriver1012]

Only "had" works for me.

Could you tell me why "having" doesn't work? Can't I make "having a job" an adverbial phrase for the sentence?

 

[Raymott]

Could you tell me why "having" doesn't work? Can't I make "having a job" an adverbial phrase for the sentence?

Because there's something ellipted - either 'I' or "was", or something else.
"Before I knew it I was in my thirties, married, having a job ..." means:
"Before I knew it, I was in my thirties, was married, was having a job ..." or
"Before I knew it, I was in my thirties, I was married, I was having a job ..."
None of these work. There's a limit to the number of different grammatical structures that you can join with commas. Ideally, they should all be parallel. Even 'had' has problems. "Before I knew it I was in my thirties, married, had a job...". In this sentence "I was" carries over to "married", but only "I" carries over to "had a job".
If you wanted to distribute only "I" over each element, you could write, "Before I knew it, I was in my thirties, was married, had a job ..." This requires "was married", not just "married".

But Ems' "with a job" was also my favourite alternative.

 

[roseriver1012]

Because there's something ellipted - either 'I' or "was", or something else.
"Before I knew it I was in my thirties, married, having a job ..." means:
"Before I knew it, I was in my thirties, was married, was having a job ..." or
"Before I knew it, I was in my thirties, I was married, I was having a job ..."
None of these work. There's a limit to the number of different grammatical structures that you can join with commas. Ideally, they should all be parallel.Even 'had' has problems. "Before I knew it I was in my thirties, married, had a job...". In this sentence "I was" carries over to "married", but only "I" carries over to "had a job".
If you wanted to distribute only "I" over each element, you could write, "Before I knew it, I was in my thirties, was married, had a job ..." This requires "was married", not just "married".

But Ems' "with a job" was also my favourite alternative.

Really grateful for your detailed explanation! About "having a job", is it all right grammatically to say "Married, having a job, I was in my thirties yet still had this idea in my mind with each passing year" ?