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    #1

    Please help me to evaluate my motivation letter .

    Statement of Purpose
    I am interested to apply for a Masterís degree programme in Materials Science and Engineering at Kiel University, scheduled to begin in October 2014. I am compassionate toward this program and I am confident that my strong academic background in Mechanical engineering, combined with relevant industrial work experience and hands on trainings will help me to fulfill the degree requirements.
    I am graduated from the Chittagong University of Engineering and Technology with my four-year bachelorís degree in Mechanical Engineering in 2007. A part form the engineering degree, I am a certified welding inspector from American Welding Society as well as Level--II in radiographic testing, ultrasonic testing, magnetic particle testing and penetrant testing from American Society of Nondestructive Testing. I have more than 5 years of work experience in Oil and Gas industries as a certified welding inspector where our major clients were leading oil manufacturers including Saudi Aramco and Petroleum development Oman. I am currently working at Al Haditha Petroleum Services where my job responsibilities includes review of construction drawings, verification of different types of materials test certificates along with visual inspection - , review of the welding procedure for different types of materials and selection of a suitable welding process for quality assurance, interpretation of radiographic films to identify the welding defects and consultation for the possible solutions, planning for strategic improvements, collaboration with the construction department regarding international codes and standards to comply with, preparation and coordination of hydro test packages.
    I have found my academic background and work practice rewarding which, I believe, motivates me to pursue graduate study in the relevant discipline. The higher study will allow me to further extend my knowledge in this field and to meet the increasing demands of todayís energy and manufacturing industries. I acquired a basic knowledge of engineering metallurgy during my undergraduate studies and further explored this subject during my certification course with the American Welding Society. Over the years these useful experiences have increased my enthusiasm to pursue a Masterís degree related to material development and engineering, sensor technology, optics, microelectronics, photovoltaic technique etc. I believe this Masterís program will contribute positively to the development of my career by potentially upgrading my current position in the workplace and will subsequently allow me to enhance my knowledge of materials science.
    Studying Materials Science and Engineering in Germany, which is the cradle of materials and origin of many mechanical engineering wonders, will avail me to solidify my knowledge both practically and theoretically. If given a chance, I will be learning at one of the best universities in Europe that offers outstanding facilities for gaining theoretical knowledge and practical skills. Besides, I will have the opportunity to develop my communication, technical, learning and presentation abilities in an international academic environment that provides the privilege of meeting people with different backgrounds and experience.
    I realize that program is highly demanded and hence competitive, yet I have the aptitude, dedication and motivation to meet the requirements and to excel at your university. I am excited to gain new learning proficiencies, and, in my view, this program will be the best way to achieve that. I look forward to attending this Masterís degree Programme at Kiel University in order to further improve my capabilities and skills and I will be eagerly waiting to hear a positive replay from you.
    Yours Sincerely
    Khaled Mahmud Azad

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    #2

    Re: Please help me to evaluate my motivation letter .

    Quote Originally Posted by kmb_cuet View Post
    Statement of Purpose
    I am interested to apply in applying for a the Masterís degree programme in Materials Science and Engineering at Kiel University, scheduled to begin in October, 2014. I am compassionate toward this program and I am confident that my strong academic background in Mechanical engineering (Why did you capitalize Mechanical and not engineering? I wouldn't capitalize either one though some people do), combined with relevant industrial work experience and hands-on trainings training will help me to fulfill the degree requirements. (You want to do more than fulfill the basic requirements, you want to succeed)

    I am graduated from the Chittagong University of Engineering and Technology with my a four-year bachelorís degree in Mechanical Engineering in 2007. A part Apart from form the engineering degree, I am a certified welding inspector from certified by the American Welding Society as well as (This whole sentence is confusing. Are you certified as a Level 11 something?) Level--II in radiographic testing, ultrasonic testing, magnetic particle testing and penetrant (What is penetrant?) testing from the American Society of Nondestructive Testing. I have more than 5 five years of work experience in Oil and Gas industries as a certified welding inspector. where

    O
    ur major clients were leading oil manufacturers (Oil isn't manufactured) including Saudi Aramco and Petroleum Development Oman. I am currently working at Al Haditha Petroleum Services where my job responsibilities includes reviews of construction drawings, verification of different types of materials test certificates along with visual inspection, reviews of the welding procedure for different types of materials and selection of a suitable welding processes for quality assurance, interpretation of radiographic films to identify the welding defects and consultation for the possible solutions, planning for strategic improvements, collaboration with the construction department regarding international codes and standards to comply with, and preparation and coordination of hydro test packages.


    I have found my academic background and work practice rewarding which, I believe, (I believe puts you in a weak position, delete it) motivates me to pursue graduate study in the relevant this discipline . The higher study will allow me to further extend my knowledge in this field and to meet the increasing demands of todayís energy and manufacturing industries. I acquired a basic knowledge of engineering metallurgy during my undergraduate studies and further explored this subject during my certification course with the American Welding Society. Over the years, these useful experiences have increased my enthusiasm to pursue a Masterís degree related to material development and engineering, sensor technology, optics, microelectronics, photovoltaic technique etc. I believe This Masterís program will contribute positively to the development of my career by potentially upgrading my current position in the workplace and will subsequently allow me to enhance my knowledge of materials science.
    Studying Materials Science and Engineering in Germany, which is the cradle of materials sciences and the origin of many mechanical engineering wonders, will avail me to solidify my knowledge both practically and theoretically. If given a chance, I will be learning at one of the best universities in Europe that which offers outstanding facilities for gaining theoretical knowledge and practical skills. Besides, I will have the opportunity to develop my communication, technical, learning and presentation abilities in an international academic environment that which provides the privilege of meeting people with different backgrounds and experience.
    I realize that program is highly demanded in high demand and, hence, competitive, yet I have the aptitude, dedication and motivation to meet the requirements and to excel at your university. I am excited to gain new learning proficiencies, and, in my view, this program will be the best way to achieve that. I look forward to attending this Masterís degree Programme at Kiel University in order to further improve my capabilities and skills and I will be eagerly waiting to hear a positive replay reply from you.
    Yours Sincerely,
    Khaled Mahmud Azad
    I deleted some of your text. It's not that it was incorrect. If you write something you probably believe it. It you state an opinion it probably is your viewpoint.

    • Member Info
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    #3

    Re: Please help me to evaluate my motivation letter .

    Quote Originally Posted by Gillnetter View Post
    I deleted some of your text. It's not that it was incorrect. If you write something you probably believe it. It you state an opinion it probably is your viewpoint.

    Mr.Gillnetter
    Thank you very much for your useful comments and advice. I am working on it and really appreciate for your kind feedback.Moreover the American Society for Nondestructive testing provide ASNT-Level-II certification and
    penetrant testing is one type of nondestructive testing.
    Could you please give me some suggestion about my first para last line , how should i write that last sentence?
    Thanks again.
    Last edited by kmb_cuet; 12-Apr-2014 at 07:42.

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