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  1. Newbie
    Interested in Language
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      • Hindi
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      • India
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      • India

    • Join Date: May 2014
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    #1

    Question Is this sentence correct?

    Is this sentence correct?

    Scenario behind this question:
    I was going out and asked my bike mechanic to repair my bike
    and inform my wife by text so that she will take further action

    In this scenario, Is below sentence is correct grammatically?

    " Try to repair the bike and if it starts successfully then text Valerie(my wife) that replacement of battery does solve the bike problem
    but if doesn't work and bike still producing noise then text her that replacement of battery doesn't solve the problem and bike still making noise, Please take further action"

    Thanks in Advance
    Its_Me_Kitanjal

  2. Newbie
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    #2

    Re: Is this sentence correct?

    Hi Members, Any suggestion????

  3. MikeNewYork's Avatar
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    #3

    Re: Is this sentence correct?

    My first suggestion is to break up the sentence. It is very long.

    "Try to repair the bike. If it starts successfully, then text Valerie(my wife) that replacing the battery did solve the bike problem.
    If doesn't work and bike is still making noise, then text her that replacing the battery didn't solve the problem and bike is still making noise. Please take further action."

    I don't understand how a bike can make noise if it doesn't start. That is not clear. Also, will the mechanic know what "Take further action" means?
    Last edited by emsr2d2; 20-May-2014 at 00:59. Reason: minor typo

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    #4

    Re: Is this sentence correct?

    Quote Originally Posted by MikeNewYork View Post
    If doesn't work
    It is missing: if it doesn't work.

  4. Roman55's Avatar
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    #5

    Re: Is this sentence correct?

    Quote Originally Posted by itsmekitanjal View Post
    and the bike is still producing noise then text her that (the) replacement of the battery doesn't solve the problem and the bike is still making noise,"
    I am not a teacher.

    It's missing a few articles and verbs as well.

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    #6

    Re: Is this sentence correct?

    Either way, you want him to text your wife, so that doesn't belong in the conditional sentences. Text my wife to let her know whether the battery replacement solves the problem or not.

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