Please check my letter

[Badr-2]

To whom it may concern,


I am a geology student at university of (........). I would like to change my degree plan from geology to computer science. I know it’s a big change but after finishing my first year in university I know that I cannot continue in this area. I worked really hard in my first year and I got high marks but that was just because I thought maybe with time I will start enjoying it, but unfortunately I’m still not interested in it at all. I don’t think I will be able to do the same thing next year.


On the other hand I think computer science is really interesting and I always read about it in my free time. I’m sure that I will expand my knowledge in this area even beyond university requirement. I’m interested in many aspects of computer science and IT security is one them.


I don’t think I can give you my best as a geologist because geology is not for me. Please consider my request as I’m sure it will be for the best.




Yours faithfully,
(.........)

___________________________________________________________________

please tell me how to improve the letter and what to add

thank you

 

[Tarheel]

There are not many mistakes, but there are a few.

To whom it may concern,


I am a geology student at university of (........). I would like to change my degree plan from geology to computer science. I know it’s a big change, but after finishing my first year in university I know that I cannot continue in this area. I worked really hard in my first year and I got high marks, but that was just because I thought maybe with time I would start enjoying it, but unfortunately I’m still not interested in it at all. I don’t think I will be able to do the same thing next year.


On the other hand, I think computer science is really interesting and I have always read about it in my free time. I’m sure that I will expand my knowledge in this area even beyond university requirements. I’m interested in many aspects of computer science, and IT security is one them.


I don’t think I can give you my best as a geologist because geology is not for me. Please consider my request, as I’m sure it will be for the best.




Yours faithfully,
(.........)

___________________________________________________________________

As you can see, it was mostly punctuation that needed attention. (You don't like using commas, do you? ;-))

 

[emsr2d2]

Please tell me how to improve the letter and what to add.

Thank you.

Remember to use capitalisation and punctuation outside the main body of your letter too.