[Essay] Can you please help me? I try to improve some answers for a possible interview!

[tony55]

Hi, my name is Tony. I am a French citizen living in Germany and I would like to improve my English and write some texts. I am looking for a job aboard and I want to be prepared for an interview. That is why I want to write texts about my studies, work experiences, interests and so on.
If you could help me and correct my text I will be very happy.

After obtaining my A-levels in Economics at the Margueritte´s school in Verdun I decided to study law and business administration at the University of Nancy. The main study subjects were civil, business and criminal law, economy but also European and international law. I successfully obtained my Bachelor´s Degree and took the opportunity to move to Montpellier in the South of France in order to get new experiences.
I decided to continue my study at the University of Montpellier and obtained two certificates in law and legal system. The first one was a Certificate in Criminology and Criminal Law. Criminology concerns behavioural sciences and draw especially upon the research of sociologists, psychologists, psychiatrists, social anthropologists, as well as scholars of law.
The second one was a Certificate of Victimology and Victim Assistance. Victimology is the study of victims, crimes but also includes other forms of human rights violations. Those two Certificates were really different of what I studied before but it was the perfect way to open my mind and learn how to analyse people's behaviour and how better react in function of their behaviours.
In order to have more advantage in my professional work I moved to Germany. My objectives were to improve my language skills and begin my own small business before to continue the study in this direction.
After two hard years of work I get a Master´s degree by correspondence at the University of Rouen. It was a Master in « Foreign Languages Applied to International Trade and Business ». The study subjects were business and economics, project management, marketing and communication, which were taught in French, German and English.


Thank you very much for your help

 

[tedmc]

Hi, my name is Tony. I am a French citizen living in Germany and I would like to improve my English and write some texts. I am looking for a job abroad and I want to be prepared for an interview. That is why I want to write texts about my studies, work experiences, interests and so on.
If you could help me (and) correct my text I will be very happy.

After obtaining my A-levels in Economics at the Margueritte´s school in Verdun, I decided to study law and business administration at the University of Nancy. The main study subjects were civil, business and criminal law, economy (Economics. The subject names should be capitalized) but also European and international law. I successfully obtained my Bachelor´s Degree and took the opportunity to move to Montpellier in the South of France in order to get new experiences.

I decided to continue my study at the University of Montpellier and obtained two certificates in law and legal system. The first one was a Certificate in Criminology and Criminal Law. Criminology concerns behavioural sciences and draws especially upon the research of sociologists, psychologists, psychiatrists, social anthropologists, as well as scholars of law.

The second one was a Certificate of Victimology and Victim Assistance. Victimology is the study of victims, crimes but also includes other forms of human rights violations. Those two Certificates were really different (of) from what I studied before but it was the perfect way to open my mind and learn how to analyse people's behaviour and (how better react in function of their behaviours, this phrase needs working on).

In order to have more advantage in my professional work, I moved to Germany. My objectives were to improve my language skills and (begin) start my own small business before (to continue) continuing with the study in this direction (not clear).

After two (hard years of work)years of hard work, I (get) got a Master´s degree by correspondence at the University of Rouen. It was a Master in « Foreign Languages Applied to International Trade and Business ». The study subjects were business and economics, project management, marketing and communication(subjects to be capitalized), which were taught in French, German and English.