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    How to improve

    I'm writing a paper on my last five CD albums I would listen to if I were stranded on a island alone. I wrote the paper (I am assuming that means essay?) but i want to see how i can improve the paper and my writing skills in general for the future. Here it is.

    Audrey Grabowski

    My last albums

    My five albums I would bring with me if I were left alone on an island cannot be put in order of importance, it was hard enough to pick only five out of the dozens of my favorite albums that are so important and sentimental to me. Simon and Garfunkel - greatest hits would most definitely be with me. Each song has a significant memory behind it, which brings back a wave of nostalgia. “For Emily, Wherever I may find her” Brings me back to my times with my uncle Raul and his daughter, my cousin Emily. He would sing that song in the car every now and then, and it still soothes me. The song “Bookends” is my absolute FAVORITE from Simon and Garfunkel. I listen to it whenever i’m sad. Being a sad song it helps me really feel my sadness and to accept it, which helps me move on from the feeling. “America” reminds me of one of my favorite movies “Almost famous” I start to daydream about being a lonely, cold, misunderstood, artist.

    I could give a memory or feeling behind every song but i think it’s time to move on to why i would bring my second album, Lana del rey - Ultraviolence. Although released this year, Lana gives a vintage sound to her music, which makes my mind swirl around into my wild, younger, teenage years, sucking me into past dangerous experiences i had in my life. She seems to be narrating my old life. We were surrounded by drugs, drinking, smoking, old music, tattoo’s, driving fast, running away, trailer parks, and boys. She’s been where i've been, and sings about it so truthfully. I do wish she sang about growing up, because i got smart after my crazy times with friends and her music only relates to my past now.

    The third album I would bring is The Doors - Waiting for the sun. I have had the most deep obsession with Jim Morrison since eighth grade. Put aside the heavy drinking, drug use, and sociopathic ways, that man was a true artist. The deep hypnotic voice, leather pants, long messy hair, and poetic lyrics made me want to jump, twirl, scream, and dance. I feel like i’m truly myself when dancing to The Doors. I feel happy, free, like Jim’s words and Ray’s key’s have found their way into my soul. Jim thought a dying indian man’s soul went into his as Jim watched him die. When i’m feeling imaginative, I like to pretend it went back into my indian soul.

    The fourth album I would bring is The Cure - Greatest hits. The cure has a sound that makes me as chill as a cucumber. They have a variety of sound that fits any mood. “Love cats” is a song i like to listen to when i clean the house or when i feel like torturing my cats and make them dance. “Lullaby” has the funniest lyrics about a spiderman coming to eat the singer. “In between days” “Let’s go to bed” and “A forest” all have amazing lyrics and a catchy beat, the sound is so unique. The Cure is truly like no other band.

    The last album I would bring has been a favorite since i came across it in middle school. Morrissey - Viva hate. I found Morrissey from another one of my favorite bands “The Smiths” Morrissey was the lead singer. Morrissey’s music ranges from sad, lonely, misunderstood to strange, awkward, british humor. He often sings of being an outsider, never finding love, being ugly and unwanted. Some label him as “The Pope of mope” but I don’t find that to be truthful. He finds gloomy topics that you can relate to, and let’s you laugh at it. For example “Girlfriend in a coma, yes i know it’s serious” Sang in a light calm tone of voice as if she has a cough. Or “The girl of my dreams…...well she never came along.” He makes you think he was narrating a beautiful love story, just to catch you off guard saying no story happened at all. My personal favorite is “You without clothes, oh I could not keep a straight face. Me without clothes well a nation turns it’s back and gags.”

    My last five albums i would listen to mean a lot to me. This assignment was difficult, to pick only five albums. I think i could live only listening to The Cure, The Doors, Lana del rey, Morrissey, and Simon and Garfunkel.

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • American English
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      • United States
      • Current Location:
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    • Join Date: Apr 2009
    • Posts: 12,310

    Re: How to improve

    Your first sentence is a run-on.

    You do not properly capitalize the titles of songs or albums. Titles should also be in quotation marks or italicized.

    You haphazardly capitalize the pronoun "I."

    "Key's" is not the plural of "key."

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