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  1. Newbie
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      • Morocco
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      • Morocco

    • Join Date: Jan 2015
    • Posts: 2
    #1

    Exclamation Urgent!! motivation letter for a scholarship !! help :P

    Hi all

    this is my first time here in the forum as a poster I used to be a reader this time I need your help since I am sure my letter contains grammatical errors, Please could anybody who has 5 minutes free continue reading!

    My letter :

    "It’s the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting" one of the best proverbs I follow to achieve my goals and ambitions, starting from my early childhood i was obssesed with drawing and sketching, i always told my parents and siblings that I would become an Architect and build a house for everyone. Since I was a student in high school the major of study i wanted to take afterwards was clear in my mind, I had to face many difficulties but I could overcome all to achieve my dream in studying Architecture.



    I decided to study architecture because of various different reasons. One of the things I enjoy very much of architecture is the relationship between the artistic and functional aspects. I have always enjoyed the process of transforming an idea or a concept from sketches to a fully fonctionnal building ,in fact every project has a story to tell. I very much wish that in the future I will be able to specialise in heritage so I can discover more about monuments and history. I feel that SAHC will help to prepare me to be able to understand and provide answers to the most intriguing questions I have at the moment.



    My initial curiosity of heritage developed early in childhood along with my continuous enthusiasm and excitement for discoveries and history, i was dreaming as a child to become an archeologist and an adventurer influenced by documentaries, novels and movies which i loved. My ambition to work within the heritage sector was further fuelled by a period of field work I undertook at school and with Euromed Mutual Heritage program concerning the local and colonial heritage in Rabat, Morocco. it was my first exposure to this field. There I enjoyed two years of workshops with international students and professionals, which I still regard as one of my most interesting, motivating, and intriguing experiences so far.



    My internship as a volunteer student in the Mont Martre cimetry in Paris added to my desire to work within the heritage system. Having stayed in Paris for over a month I had the opportunity to work with professionals in the heritage field on the restauration of one of the most beautiful graves in the cimetry that was known as the princess Potocka chapel, Supervised by a professional restorer, I was introduced to the restoration of the stone and ethics of conservation, also protecting the monument from the agressif surrounding environnement. I had the opportunity to visit many other munuments that were restored by our supervisor it was always fascinating to hear him tell us the stories behind them and how the choice of the wrong materials sometimes could litteraly damage the whole proces.



    As a student in the "studio patrimoine" I had the opportinuty to work on many important built heritage within the medina of Rabat , i had the chance to take part of the project "Rabat as an international heritage" since our professor was the project director our contribution was consisting of first analysing one of the medina main streets then giving a proposition to restore it which should be originating from its own story, i was able also to visit many buildings varying from forts to riads (traditional residential mansions in Morocco). Reports were submitted regarding their Architectural composition and aspects ,their composition and their structural schemes .



    Because of the absence of a Heritage Master program inside Morocco since the receng awereness of its importance , my ambition to specialise in the field of heritage and to meet international professionals seems to be impossible, in the other hand as a citizen of a third world contry my financial conditions dosn't allow me to continu my studies abroad since the cost of such a master degree is high; eventhough i feel like i am standing in front of a big wall that keeps me from pursuing what i like most i will do whatever i can to make this dream come true; For this reason, I had to look for a solution for this huge problem.



    The first step to take was improving my skills to raise my opportunities. I started to take intensive lessons in English, since most universities in Europe require a certain level of English proficiency for their graduate programs.



    The second step was searching for convenient universities that offer the best opportunities and fit best to my needs. Through the search, I accidently met a previous Erasmus Mundus Scholarship holder after looking at the progam announcement in the internet, it seemed to be the outlet I was looking for.



    Reading about all partner universities, I found that SAHC have a very good rank in the major of conservation and restoration of the architectural heritage, in addition to having a relashionship with ICOMOS International Scientific Committee for Analysis and Restoration of Structures of Architectural Heritage. All these reasons together made SAHC my number one priority among all Erasmus Mundus Master programs.



    I want to study in SAHC because of its outstanding educational programme on the engineering of conservation of structures with a focus on architectural heritage. So I am confident of my decision. I know that I will gain expert knowledge at the forefront of discovery. All these strong positives allow me to pursue my dreams and ambitions.



    Given my past history of commitment to achieve my dream, I am confident that I will exceed the expectations, because of both my academic and interpersonal skills. I will enrich the program by enabling fellow students and professors to benefit from my ambitious and open nature. Furthermore, my international background will add more diversity to your program.
    Thank you for considering my application, and I look forward to your positive reply.

    Sincerely,
    Last edited by neox00; 06-Jan-2015 at 13:23.

  2. emsr2d2's Avatar
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      • British English
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      • UK
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      • UK

    • Join Date: Jul 2009
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    #2

    Re: Urgent!! motivation letter for a scholarship !! help :P

    Quote Originally Posted by neox00 View Post
    Hi all

    This is my first time here in the forum as a poster​. I used to be a reader only but this time I need your help since I am sure my letter contains grammatical errors. plz Please could anybody who have has 5 minutes free continue reading downward!!
    Your letter is far too long for me to do justice to. I simply don't have time for such a long piece at the moment. However, in the meantime, please see my important corrections to the rest of your writing. It is important to follow these rules of written English at all times:

    - Start every sentence with a capital letter.
    - End every sentence with a single, appropriate punctuation mark.
    - Always capitalise the word "I".
    - Always capitalise proper nouns (English, Shakespeare, Microsoft, Italy etc)
    - Do not put a space before a comma, full stop, question mark or exclamation mark.
    - Always put a space after a comma, full stop, question mark or exclamation mark.

    Use full, standard English words. "Plz" does not exist.

    Before anyone starts correcting your letter, it would be good if you would click on "Edit Post" and make some changes based on the rules I just gave, particularly with regard to capitalising the word "I" and the spacing around punctuation. Remember to click "Save" after you finish editing.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

  3. Newbie
    Student or Learner
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      • Native Language:
      • French
      • Home Country:
      • Morocco
      • Current Location:
      • Morocco

    • Join Date: Jan 2015
    • Posts: 2
    #3

    Re: Urgent!! motivation letter for a scholarship !! help :P

    Hello thanks for your quick feed back Emsr2d2

    I would do what you just suggested and I would be waiting for more correction if anybody does have any spare time to help in finiching this letter, thanks in advance and thanks again Emsr2d2.
    Last edited by emsr2d2; 06-Jan-2015 at 14:04. Reason: Removed unnecessary quote

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