MS3330
Junior Member
- Joined
- Jun 3, 2014
- Member Type
- Academic
- Native Language
- Persian
- Home Country
- Iran
- Current Location
- Australia
The following is a short observation story. Could you please let me know how I can improve it?
Morag, Fraser’s mum, sent us a very lovely card and let us know they moved the house and Fraser won’t be returning to the MCCC next year. We arranged a play date as we knew Fraser and Kia have become great friends.
When I was packing the picnic basket, Kia kept saying "one juice for Kia, one juice for Fraser", "one apple for Kia, one apple for Fraser" ….
In the car while I was driving he kept asking me "Is Fraser there? Can I play with Fraser?" ….
We went to Royal Botanical garden. Fraser and Kia played together and had fun in the water playground. They played Hide and Seek while both of them hide in the same time and closed their eyes in the same time.
They were not happy when we decided to get back home.
We promised them to arrange another playdate.
Morag, Fraser’s mum, sent us a very lovely card and let us know they moved the house and Fraser won’t be returning to the MCCC next year. We arranged a play date as we knew Fraser and Kia have become great friends.
When I was packing the picnic basket, Kia kept saying "one juice for Kia, one juice for Fraser", "one apple for Kia, one apple for Fraser" ….
In the car while I was driving he kept asking me "Is Fraser there? Can I play with Fraser?" ….
We went to Royal Botanical garden. Fraser and Kia played together and had fun in the water playground. They played Hide and Seek while both of them hide in the same time and closed their eyes in the same time.
They were not happy when we decided to get back home.
We promised them to arrange another playdate.