Page 1 of 3 1 2 3 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 22
  1. Newbie
    Student or Learner
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia

    • Join Date: Jan 2015
    • Posts: 6
    #1

    please score and correct my essay

    Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems.
    To what extend do you agree or disagree?
    What other measures do you think might be effective?

    Nowadays in the twenty-first century, it is irrefutable fact that the word is suffering from traffic congestion. Consequently, a tremendous number of people unanimously believe that increasing the petrol's price is the best way to solve this issue. Personally, I completely accord with this opinion, and below I will endeavor to show some light on other measures that could be efficient in solving this problem.

    First and foremost, a study was conducted to show the relation between traffic jam and petrol's price on different countries. The study covered Saudi Arabia, Japan, Switzerland and US. It demonstrates that the highest traffic problem was in Saudi Arabia followed by Japan, US than Switzerland which was the least. Compared to the price of the Petrol, Saudi Arabia a the lowest petrol's price while Switzerland has the highest. From this study, it is clearly can be seen that there is a strong relation between raising the expenses of the petrol and solving the traffic congestion.

    Moreover, living in a country that is suffer from traffic jam undoubtedly means living in a polluted area. No one can deny that Switzerland has the least pollution air and water over the world. Based on the Swiss's ministry of health, all the waterfall water are suitable for drinking. On the other hand, tap water on Saudi Arabia is not suitable for drinking.

    In order to solve this problem different action should be taken. First, government should provide public transportation. The public transportation facility should be free for students and government employee. Also, it should be provided for public with a very low price to encourage them to use it.

    Yo sum up, I believe that in order to save the environment for the next generations we should take a step froward. And the first step that need to be taken is raising the price of the petrol.

  2. Tarheel's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • American English
      • Home Country:
      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States

    • Join Date: Jun 2014
    • Posts: 11,060
    #2

    Re: please score and correct my essay

    Good formatting!

    Quote Originally Posted by ielts 9 View Post
    To what extend do you agree or disagree?
    You might want to respell something there.

    Quote Originally Posted by ielts 9 View Post
    Nowadays in the twenty-first century, it is irrefutable fact that the word is suffering from traffic congestion.
    You might have a spelling problem there.

    Quote Originally Posted by ielts 9 View Post
    Consequently, a tremendous number of people unanimously believe that increasing the petrol's price is the best way to solve this issue.
    There might be some unintentional humor there.

    When are you going to be giving this to your teacher for grading?

  3. Newbie
    Student or Learner
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia

    • Join Date: Jan 2015
    • Posts: 6
    #3

    Re: please score and correct my essay

    Quote Originally Posted by Tarheel View Post
    Good formatting!

    When are you going to be giving this to your teacher for grading?
    I won't give it to anyone , It's not for grading. I'm preparing for my IELTS exam.
    I'm trying to improve my writing and this question is one of the IELTS practices test.

    can this essay score 6.5 or more?
    Also could you please provide me with my mistakes to avoid it?

  4. emsr2d2's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • British English
      • Home Country:
      • UK
      • Current Location:
      • UK

    • Join Date: Jul 2009
    • Posts: 41,843
    #4

    Re: please score and correct my essay

    Tarheel already posted two of your sentences which contain spelling errors. Perhaps you should identify the spelling errors and correct them before expecting us to point out other errors.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

  5. Newbie
    Student or Learner
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia

    • Join Date: Jan 2015
    • Posts: 6
    #5

    Re: please score and correct my essay

    Quote Originally Posted by emsr2d2 View Post
    Tarheel already posted two of your sentences which contain spelling errors. Perhaps you should identify the spelling errors and correct them before expecting us to point out other errors.
    There is no spelling error in the sentence that Tarheel posted.
    I double cheek the whole essay by putting it on Microsoft word to see if there is any spelling error.

    There is a spilling error in the essay but not on these to sentence that Tarheel posted.

    Are you sure!!!

  6. emsr2d2's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • British English
      • Home Country:
      • UK
      • Current Location:
      • UK

    • Join Date: Jul 2009
    • Posts: 41,843
    #6

    Re: please score and correct my essay

    Quote Originally Posted by ielts 9 View Post
    There is no spelling error in the sentence that Tarheel posted.
    I double cheek the whole essay by putting it on Microsoft word to see if there is any spelling error.

    There is a spilling error in the essay but not on these to sentence that Tarheel posted.

    Are you sure? !!!
    The problem with spellcheck is that if the word you have typed is in the dictionary, it won't realise it's not the word you meant. Both of the errors to which I refer are errors which have resulted in a totally different English word. Have another look at those sentences Tarheel drew your attention to. Look very carefully at every single word.

    Look at the post I have quoted in this post. There are three spelling errors - I have marked them in red.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

  7. Newbie
    Student or Learner
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Arabic
      • Home Country:
      • Saudi Arabia
      • Current Location:
      • Saudi Arabia

    • Join Date: Jan 2015
    • Posts: 6
    #7

    Re: please score and correct my essay

    Thank you all emsr2d2 and Tarheel for your feedback. I relay appreciate it.

    Nowadays in the twenty-first century, it is irrefutable fact that the word [world] is suffering from traffic congestion.

    For the second sentence, is it petrol's, I should't write apostrophe then s and it should be petrol because it's non countable? am I right?

    Consequently = correct
    a = correct
    tremendous = correct
    number = correct
    of = correct
    people = correct
    unanimously = correct
    believe = correct
    that = correct
    increasing = correct
    the = correct
    petrol's
    price = correct
    is = correct
    the = correct
    best = correct
    way = correct
    to = correct
    solve = correct
    this = correct
    issue. = correct

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Polish
      • Home Country:
      • Poland
      • Current Location:
      • UK

    • Join Date: Sep 2014
    • Posts: 101
    #8

    Re: please score and correct my essay

    (not a teacher)

    The extent of the problem with the essay may not be immediately clear. However, there may be undesirable consequences if you leave it now for an extended period of time.


    I made the same mistake.
    Last edited by Auldlangsyne; 10-Mar-2015 at 22:32.
    The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large matter - 'tis the difference between the lightning-bug and the lightning.
    Mark Twain

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Chinese
      • Home Country:
      • Hong Kong
      • Current Location:
      • Indonesia

    • Join Date: Mar 2015
    • Posts: 155
    #9

    Re: please score and correct my essay

    Quote Originally Posted by ielts 9 View Post
    Thank you all emsr2d2 and Tarheel for your feedback. I relay appreciate it.

    Nowadays in the twenty-first century, it is a irrefutable fact that the word [world] is suffering from traffic congestion.

    For the second sentence, is it petrol's, I should't write apostrophe then s and it should be petrol because it's non countable? am I right?
    You should use 'a' when saying about one irrefutable fact. Don't use 'a' if it is plural but since irrefutable fact is singular, use it.

    ***Not a teacher***

  8. emsr2d2's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • British English
      • Home Country:
      • UK
      • Current Location:
      • UK

    • Join Date: Jul 2009
    • Posts: 41,843
    #10

    Re: please score and correct my essay

    Almost right, TechnistWarp, except it needs to be an irrefutable fact because of the vowel sound at the start of "irrefutable".

    ielts9, the third sentence Tarheel quoted didn't have a spelling error. He didn't say it did. He said it might contain some unintentional humour.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

Page 1 of 3 1 2 3 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. [Essay] could anyone please correct my ielts essay an tell me my score
    By shadic in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 24-Feb-2013, 02:31
  2. Help me correct and give a score to this essay, please!
    By chinghia in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 26-Oct-2012, 04:16
  3. please correct my Essay and please give a score
    By rezashena in forum Ask a Teacher
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 29-May-2009, 20:51
  4. please correct my Essay and please give a score
    By rezashena in forum Editing & Writing Topics
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 01-May-2009, 16:44

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •