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  1. #1
    Belato is offline Newbie
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    Please, help me to improve my letter of motivation (regenerative medicine)

    Hello. I am applying for a PhD program of my dream and my letter of motivation had better be impeccable. Could you, please, criticize it and suggest how could I improve it? I will be glad if somebody would show my mistakes in the letter. It must be up to 2000 characters with spaces. It has not to contain information about my research experience: only scientific interest.

    Letter:

    Regenerative medicine caught my particular attention when I was studying at the University. In that time I was interested in gerontology and anti-aging therapies. Among various developing methods of resisting age-related diseases, regenerative technologies seemed to me the most perspective for achieving this goal since they can renew human body, not simply conserve it. While I was studying scientific articles and reviews on the regenerative medicine iPSCs most of all attracted my attention. It was due to my long-term interest in cell biology, but what's more the possibility to reprogram cells impressed me. It opens a vast space for a great variety of experiments. iPSCs are used for a wide specter of tasks, not only for therapy, but also for disease modeling and for drugs development. Though numerous things are still to be revealed. That is why I intend to study iPSCs in my future scientific work.
    I apply for NNN PhD program as it perfectly meets my expectations. Several years ago I was already dreaming to work in a laboratory cluster concentrated on studies in the field of regenerative medicine. This program attracts me by its rich content allowing to expand knowledge and improve practical skills. Another important point for me is that NNN unites diverse research groups. So I will be able to communicate with different researchers, learn what problems they are solving and what they have discovered thereby extending my own understanding of situation. I believe that dialogue between various research fields is essential for the overall progress.
    My intention is to perform studies towards Ph.D. degree and afterwards to continue scientific researches at a postdoc position.

  2. #2
    Raymott's Avatar
    Raymott is offline VIP Member
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    Re: Please, help me to improve my letter of motivation (regenerative medicine)

    Quote Originally Posted by Belato View Post
    Regenerative medicine caught my particular attention when I was studying at the University. In that time I was interested in gerontology and anti-aging therapies. Among various developing methods of resisting age-related diseases, regenerative technologies seemed to me the most perspective for achieving this goal since they can renew the human body, not simply conserve it. While I was studying scientific articles and reviews on the regenerative medicine, iPSCs attracted my attention most of all. It was due to my long-term interest in cell biology, but what's more the possibility to reprogram cells impressed me. It opens a vast space for a great variety of experiments. iPSCs are used for a wide specter (spectrum?) of tasks, not only for therapy, but also for disease modeling and for drugs development. Though numerous things [factors/aspects. 'Things' is not a good word in academia] are still to be revealed. That is why I intend to study iPSCs in my future scientific work.
    I apply [am applying / have applied] for NNN PhD program as it perfectly meets my expectations. Several years ago I was already dreaming to work of working in a laboratory cluster [?] concentrated on studies in the field of regenerative medicine. This program attracts me by its rich content allowing to which would allow me to expand my knowledge and improve my practical skills. Another important point for me is that NNN unites diverse research groups. So I will would [You don't have the job yet] be able to communicate with different researchers, learn what problems they are solving and what they have discovered, thereby extending my own understanding of the situation. I believe that dialogue between various research fields is essential for the overall progress.
    My intention is to perform studies towards the Ph.D. [often simply PhD these days - I'd suggest you check and use the format the university uses; besides, you need to be consistant with the above] degree and afterwards to continue scientific researches at a postdoctoral [It's a formal letter] position.
    Your written English is fine.

  3. #3
    tedmc is offline VIP Member
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    Re: Please, help me to improve my letter of motivation (regenerative medicine)

    Among the various developing methods of resisting age-related diseases, regenerative technologies seemed to me the most perspective for achieving this goal since they can renew the human body, not simply conserve it.

    What do you mean by 'developing methods'? Do you mean 'methods under development/research'?
    "Perspective" does not seem to be the appropriate word. Promising? Prospective?

    not a teacher

  4. #4
    emsr2d2's Avatar
    emsr2d2 is offline Moderator
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    Re: Please, help me to improve my letter of motivation (regenerative medicine)

    "Prospective" doesn't fit there either.
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

  5. #5
    Belato is offline Newbie
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    Re: Please, help me to improve my letter of motivation (regenerative medicine)

    Raymott, thank you very much!

    tedmc,
    Do you mean 'methods under development/research'?
    Yes. Exactly this.

  6. #6
    Tarheel's Avatar
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    Re: Please, help me to improve my letter of motivation (regenerative medicine)

    Belato, don't forget to make paragraph breaks. (Space between paragraphs.)


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