Student or Learner
I just proofread an article I'm working on but have several sentenced i'd appreciate someone looking at before I submit...
"In Tooley’s report, Nelly described the * and * she suffered at the hands of Jarrett Webb, beginning at the age of 9 or 10."
- Does "describes" work here instead of described, even though it is past tense?
"Another person Walters asked said, “....
- Does a comma come after asked?
"According to Carmean’s report, Loretta explained to him how she became involved in* at the age of 9 years old, when she was invited to a party by someolder friends and met a white male adult who convinced her to go back tohis place and pose for some pictures."
-Do I need more commas in this sentence. Maybe after "male adult"?
"The parties went on for 6 months before the men took the girls to what they called “power meetings,” where they were told that they needed to “.......”
- Is a comma required after "power meetings"?
"Foster Care Review Board (FCRB) Director, Carol Stitt, testified before the legislative committee and said,"....."
-Is director capitalized? And could I just go into the quote or should I have the "and said" part?
"Specifically, Alisha said she started at the age of 14 when boys from Boys Town took her to a party."
- Do I need a comma after 14?
"*, *, and *were, respectively, Mayor, Police Chief and Game and Parks Commissioner for thecity of *."
- Do I need a comma before and after "respectively"?
"In early July '90, Caradori called Senator Schmidt to tell him about a new piece of evidence he had come across, "We've got them!" he said. There's no way they can get out of it now.""
-Is this sentence punctuated correctly?
"the World-Herald came to Van Pelt’s defense in an editorial titled “Van Pelt’s Report on Kirk Followed the Evidence.”
- Do I need a comma after "titled" for introducing the name of the article?
I'm sorry for throwing a bunch of sentences all in one post, but these are my last final checks before I can submit.
Thank you again,
Last edited by emsr2d2; 23-Mar-2015 at 10:33. Reason: Standardised and enlarged font size