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  1. Newbie
    Student or Learner
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States

    • Join Date: Mar 2015
    • Posts: 1

    Critique my Cover Letter?

    Sending out a cover letter, would appreciate advice or critique.

    Dear Hiring Manager:
    I am applying for the position of Judaic Studies Teacher at the Xxxx Academy. I read about the position opening up in last month’s Xxxx Journal and was very impressed with SLYA’s ideals and goal of “Inspiring Our Future Leaders.” My education, experience, and passion for the Jewish community would make me a great fit for your school and your students.
    I am currently working towards a BA in Jewish Studies and a Teaching Minor from the University of Xxxx. I also attended a Jewish day school for my entire secondary education. I have received high grades in courses, like Jewish-American History, Israeli Culture, and Hebrew, which have given me knowledge that could greatly benefit Jewish students. I received a Jewish education beyond that of many Jewish Americans, and I want to use my education to inspire the future leaders of the Jewish people.
    Outside of school, I have spent much of my free time working with Jewish organizations. I am currently a board member of the Xxxx Student Group in Xxx City, where I direct outreach efforts to reach out to Jewish students on campus. This role helped me develop time management skills and the ability to connect with others. I have also acted as chazzan for Shabbat and holiday services, giving me a greater appreciation for Jewish theology and literature.
    I also have experience in educating students. I spent a summer teaching music reading and performance skills to campers, which taught me ways to impart information and connect with students. I also directed the orchestra for my high school’s musical production in my senior year. Working with students over a period of several months helped me to understand how to best connect with individual students and encourage them to learn and succeed.

    I have attached a copy of my resume with this letter. I will be in the Orlando area for the next three weeks, and I would appreciate the chance to discuss my experience further. You can reach me by phone at (xxx) xxx-xxxx or by email at emailadress. I am available to meet with you at your convenience.


    Last edited by emsr2d2; 03-Apr-2015 at 14:14. Reason: Enlarged font to make it readable.

  2. emsr2d2's Avatar
    English Teacher
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • British English
      • Home Country:
      • UK
      • Current Location:
      • UK

    • Join Date: Jul 2009
    • Posts: 58,464

    Re: Critique my Cover Letter?

    I suggest you find out the name of the HR Manager (we don't use "Hiring Manager") in order to make the letter more personal.

    Please add line breaks between your paragraphs by clicking on "Edit Post", making the requisite changes and then clicking "Save".
    Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.

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