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    #1

    Is it correct to say.....?

    Recently, I go to cinema to watch the excited film. I go to buy a ticket in the counter.
    And then, when the movie finished, I left the cinema and dial my phone to my friend.
    Hello, Peter.
    P: Hello, Polyester, what's the hell on earth?
    me: I just finished the movie in the cinema. It's excited. I love it. I want to recommend to you.
    P:Hey, friend. Don't do that. You knew I lost my job three days ago. I haven't enough money to spending on it. I also not interesting in it.
    I spent my whole time to find a job. If you are my best friend, you should advice me to find a job.
    me: OKOK. I try to help you and find you next week.


    My question is "Is my story correct and grammatical ?

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    #2

    Re: Is it correct to say.....?

    Recently, I go to cinema to watch the excited film. I go to buy a ticket in the counter.
    And then, when the movie finished, I left the cinema and dial my phone to my friend.
    Hello, Peter.
    P: Hello, Polyester, what's the hell on earth?
    me: I just finished the movie in the cinema. It's excited. I love it. I want to recommend to you.
    P:Hey, friend. Don't do that. You knew I lost my job three days ago. I haven't enough money to spending on it. I also not interesting in it.
    I spent my whole time to find a job. If you are my best friend, you should advice me to find a job.
    me: OKOK. I try to help you and find you next week.

    Polyester
    The parts underlined need correction. Please look into it.
    I am not a teacher.

  1. Matthew Wai's Avatar
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    #3

    Re: Is it correct to say.....?

    Quote Originally Posted by tedmc View Post
    Recently, I go to cinema to watch the excited film.
    I think something is missing between 'to' and 'cinema', but I am not a teacher.

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    #4

    Re: Is it correct to say.....?

    Not a teacher

    'Recently, I go to cinema to watch the excited film.' can be changed to 'Recently I watched an exciting film.'

    It's unnatural that you put 'I go to buy a ticket in the counter.' before 'Recently, I go to cinema to watch the excited film.' I suggest the following instead: 'Having watched an exciting film, I phoned/called my friend.'

    me: Hello, Peter.
    P: Hello, Polyester. What's up?
    me: I just finished a movie. [I assume Peter does not know which movie you are referring to.] It's exciting. I love it. I want to recommend it to you. ['Recommend' is a transitive verb. It has to be followed by a noun.]
    P: Hey, friend. Don't do that. You know I lost my job three days ago. I haven't enough money to spend on movies/entertainment. I also am not interested in it. [Alternatively, you can say 'I haven't enough money to spend on movies, not to mention I'm not interested in it.'] My time should be spent seeking a job. If you are my best friend, you should advise me to find a job.
    me: OKOK. I will try to help you and I will get back to you [This sounds more natural.] next week.

    My suggestions for you:
    Work on tenses (future tense and past tense) and articles. Distinguish between adjectives and adverbs. After these, you can check out some colloquial expressions/slangs (informal expressions that are appropriate for spoken conversations) and learn more about descriptive writing.
    Last edited by emsr2d2; 13-Aug-2015 at 19:35. Reason: Added "Not a teacher" to the beginning of the post

  2. Matthew Wai's Avatar
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    #5

    Re: Is it correct to say.....?

    'Cinema' and 'buy a ticket' have been omitted from the above suggestions, so I think Peter might not know that the film was watched at the cinema instead of home, but I am not a teacher.

  3. Piscean's Avatar
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    #6

    Re: Is it correct to say.....?

    When I registered with this site, I thought that questions in the 'Ask a Teacher' forum might be answered by teachers. We live and learn.
    Last edited by Rover_KE; 13-Aug-2015 at 22:49. Reason: Fixing typo.

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    #7

    Re: Is it correct to say.....?

    I moved this thread here from the 'Ask a Teacher' forum as I considered this to be a better place for it.

    You will have read the following posting guideline:

    You are welcome to answer questions posted in the Ask a Teacher forum as long as your suggestions, help, and advice reflect a good understanding of the English language. If you are not a teacher, you will need to state that clearly in your post. Please note, all posts are moderated by our in-house language experts, so make sure your suggestions, help, and advice provide the kind of information an international language teacher would offer. If not, and your posts do not contribute to the topic in a positive way, they will be subject to deletion.

    You are free to correct erroneous posts from non-teachers; in fact, you have already done so and we welcome that.

    If you consider a reply so bad as to be worthy of deletion, you can always report it by clicking on the
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    #8

    Re: Is it correct to say.....?

    Are you helping me or not?
    Last edited by Rover_KE; 14-Aug-2015 at 08:03. Reason: Deleting unnecessary quote.

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    #9

    Re: Is it correct to say.....?

    You can be sure than erroneous posts from non-teachers would not escape the hawk eyes of the teachers.

    Polyester, I think you would learn better if you have a go at the corrections yourself.
    I am not a teacher.

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    #10

    Re: Is it correct to say.....?

    I think Polyester has waited long enough. Here's one suggestion:


    Recently, I went to the cinema to see (/ and saw) an exciting film (/movie). I bought a ticket at the ticket office.

    When the film (/ movie) ended, I left the cinema and called my friend.

    Me: Hello, Peter.
    P: Hello, Polyester. What's up?
    Me: I've just been to the cinema. It was an exciting film. I loved it. I recommend you see it.
    P: Hey, friend. Don't do that to me. You know I lost my job three days ago. I haven't the money to spend on films. Anyway, I am not interested. I am spending all my time looking for a job. As my best friend, you should advise me to find a job.
    Me: OK, OK. I'll try to help you find one next week.

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