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    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • Chinese
      • Home Country:
      • Singapore
      • Current Location:
      • Singapore

    • Join Date: Aug 2009
    • Posts: 469
    #1

    How to sound more friendly?

    (Email is at the bottom of this post ~~~~~)

    I am writing an email to ask some questions. How can I make it more polite? I want the user to sense that I am a friendly man.

    Q1 Is the email polite now?

    Q2 What improvements can be made to make it sound more polite?

    Q3 Is it more friendly to add some sentences like "Hope you don't mind me asking some questions", "If you don't mind me asking", "Thanks a lot", "I appreciate it"... if yes, how? Any other suggestions?

    Email:
    ~~~~~
    Hi Peter,

    Some questions:

    1. What is the price?

    2. Are there instructions for the product setup?

    3. How many people are attending?

    Thanks,
    Jack
    ~~~~~

    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • English
      • Home Country:
      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States

    • Join Date: Dec 2009
    • Posts: 6,332
    #2

    Re: How to sound more friendly?

    Quote Originally Posted by goodstudent View Post
    ~~~~~
    Hi Peter,

    Mind if I ask a few questions?

    1. What's the price?

    2. Do you have any instructions for the product setup?

    3. Will there be a lot of people there?

    Thanks a lot,
    Jack
    ~~~~~

    ***** NOT A TEACHER *****

    Although I never send email, I do receive a lot of it (spam).

    It seems to me that people are so busy nowadays that they appreciate short, to-the-point email messages.

    In my opinion, your email is fine. But I have made a few suggested changes in order to make it appear more "friendly."

    Instead of "What is," I changed it to the contraction. This may make the sentence sound more relaxed and informal and even less demanding.

    Instead of "Are there," I changed it to "Do you ...?" This brings Peter into the conversation and shows your respect for his opinion.

    I also changed #3 to make it sound more "folksy." "How many people will be attending?" sounds too "cold." "A lot of" sounds more informal than "many."
    Last edited by TheParser; 14-Oct-2015 at 13:33.

  1. MikeNewYork's Avatar
    • Member Info
      • Native Language:
      • American English
      • Home Country:
      • United States
      • Current Location:
      • United States

    • Join Date: Nov 2002
    • Posts: 24,983
    #3

    Re: How to sound more friendly?

    "Will there be a lot of people there" is a different question from "how many people are attending". They ask for different information.

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