Creative objective, resume

[DrBlueThumb]

Hi, I am applying for a position in which they want someone with creativity. Can you check this for grammar, etiquette, cohesion etc. The position is to be a cake decorator. Thanks, Clint

CREATIVE OBJECTIVE
I feel that because of my 12 years experience in the propagation (grow out and division), of rare, expensive, exotic corals, which are beautifully, flowered like, colorful, half animal/ half plant like creatures that originate under the water in the saline oceans. Qualifies me as being a person with creativity, because you have to cut these specimens and arrange them in a particular fashion to create a colorful piece of art. Just like a bouquet of multi-colored specifically arranged flowers. I would love to use this “unique” ability to find permanent employment where I can utilize my abilities to learn new things.

Should

 

[Tarheel]

I suggest that you rewrite the first three "sentences" so that they really are sentences. As for the fourth one, I suggest:

I would love to use this unique ability in a job where I can use my ability to learn new things and put my creativity to work.​

 

[teechar]

CREATIVE OBJECTIVE
I [STRIKE]feel that because of my[/STRIKE] have 12 years' experience in the propagation (growing [STRIKE]out[/STRIKE] and dividing) [STRIKE]division),[/STRIKE] of rare, expensive, exotic corals, which are beautiful, flowered like, colorful, half-animal- half-plant-like creatures that originate [STRIKE]under the water[/STRIKE] in the [STRIKE]saline[/STRIKE] oceans. I believe that experience qualifies me as [STRIKE]being[/STRIKE] a person with special creativity. This is because you have to cut these specimens and arrange them in a particular fashion to create a colorful piece of art, just like a bouquet of multi-colored specifically arranged flowers. I would love to use my special skills and experience [STRIKE]this “unique” ability to find[/STRIKE] in a position of permanent employment where I can contribute positively and creatively. [STRIKE]utilize my abilities to learn new things.[/STRIKE]

[STRIKE]Should[/STRIKE]

 

[Tarheel]

Maybe next time we should give DrBlueThumb a chance to do his own rewrite first.