Letter of recommendation - is it correct?

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Amy0710

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Hello.

English is not my mother language so that I need some help now,

Please check if there are incorrect things in the letter of recommendation below.

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Dear XXX

I am pleased to write this letter of recommendation in support of OOO, who is applying to the master’s degree program in business analytics at XXX Business School.

As professor of the Public Administration Department at XXX University, I have taught and worked with many students who have substantial knowledge of public administration, especially in financial and accounting field. OOO has consistently shown such a strong desire to learn about business sector dealing with quantitative and mathematics skills that I simply could not turn down his request for a recommendation.

I first met OOO in my Intro to ‘Governmental Accounting’ course during the Spring 2009 semester when she was a senior-year student. While attending my lectures, she not only attended all classes of the course punctually, but submitted exceptionally well assignments. She distinguished herself as a highly intelligent and hard-working student by showing an ability to learn the concepts and practices of accounting quickly and completing the course with the highest grade in a class of seventy at that year.

I am sure that OOO has a very high level of academic achievement and she is one of the top 5% of XXX University students. I highly recommend that you consider her application, as he will be a great asset to your program.


Yours sincerely

XXX
Professor of Public Administration
XXX University
 

teechar

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Dear XXX,

I am pleased to write this letter of recommendation in support of OOO, who is applying [STRIKE]to[/STRIKE] for the master’s degree program in business analytics at XXX Business School.

As professor of the Public Administration Department at XXX University, I have taught and worked with many students who have substantial knowledge of public administration, especially in finance [STRIKE]ial[/STRIKE] and accounting. [STRIKE]field.[/STRIKE] OOO has consistently shown such a strong desire to learn about the business sector [STRIKE]dealing with[/STRIKE] and she has outstanding quantitative and mathematics skills. [STRIKE]that I simply could not turn down his request for a recommendation.[/STRIKE]

I first met OOO in my 'Introduction to Governmental Accounting’ course during the Spring [STRIKE]2009[/STRIKE] semester in 2009 when she was a senior-year student. [STRIKE]While attending my lectures, she not only[/STRIKE] She attended all lectures, was always punctual and [STRIKE]classes of the course punctually, but[/STRIKE] submitted exceptionally well-written assignments. She distinguished herself as a highly intelligent and hard-working student by showing an ability to learn the concepts and practices of accounting quickly and completing the course with the highest grade in a class of seventy [STRIKE]at[/STRIKE] that year.

[STRIKE]I am sure that[/STRIKE] OOO [STRIKE]has a[/STRIKE] is a very high-achieving student, [STRIKE]level of academic achievement[/STRIKE] and she is [STRIKE]one of[/STRIKE] in the top 5% of students in XXX University. [STRIKE]students.[/STRIKE] I highly recommend that you consider her application, as she will be a great asset to your program.


Yours sincerely,

XXX
Professor of Public Administration
XXX University
.
 
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