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    #1

    Is my sentence understandable?

    Hello,
    I am trying to write an essay. Below is one of the sentences that I will be using in my essay:

    "I am satisfied with the level of mutual intimacy shared in each of my relationships that I, as an unique individual, have with other members of the community"

    Is the above sentence understandable? is there any better way to write the same sentence?

  1. probus's Avatar
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    #2

    Re: Is my sentence understandable?

    It is perfectly intelligible, and pretty natural in my opinion.

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    #3

    Re: Is my sentence understandable?

    Change 'an' to 'a' and add a punctuation mark at the end.

    A better title would have been I am satisified with the level of mutual intimacy...

    Extract from the Posting Guidelines:

    'Thread titles should include all or part of the word/phrase being discussed.'

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    #4

    Re: Is my sentence understandable?

    Yes, it's understandable, but not very natural, in my opinion. It reads as if you're going for an assigned word count- perhaps you are.

    "as an unique individual" is not correct. We use the article 'a' before consonant sounds, even when they are written as vowels.

    'I wear a uniform and carry an umbrella.'

  2. Raymott's Avatar
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    #5

    Re: Is my sentence understandable?

    Quote Originally Posted by jdschnieder View Post

    "I am satisfied with the level of mutual intimacy shared in each of my relationships that I, as an unique individual, have with other members of the community"
    I'd find it more natural with "my" changed to "the" - "... each of the relationships that I have ...".
    And I'd delete "as a unique individual". Are you implying that, as an ordinary person similar to most other people, you would not be satisfied with this?

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    #6

    Re: Is my sentence understandable?

    mutual intimacy shared
    This seems a bit redundant to me- I would remove mutual.

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